All hail the Dreaded Mummy Bloggers.

by Lori Dwyer on September 27, 2010 · 31 comments


I was lucky enough to attend a mummy blogger meet up tonight (well, not actually tonight, back on Sunday when I wrote this). It was sponsored by Nuffnang. They sent the muchly cool Vanessa and Sarah to keep an eye on us chill out with the bloggers. And I got to meet some awesome people. People like Brenda (who I’ve already met, but, hey, she’s awesome), Jodie, Eden, Corrinne, Julie, Beth and Christie.

We ate churros and chocolate and drunk coffee. And Vanessa and I smoked dirty cigarettes. We talked, we laughed, we swapped stories, ideas and opinions. It felt like meeting new people, who I’ve known for like, ages and ages, or in another cyber life. Or in my imagination. Or something.

Topics of conversation ranged from SEO, to penis (in a totally abstract form, I promise), from blog sponsors to mother-in-law’s (mine), and onto guest posts, advertising and why a review post is worth more than a loaf of bread. There was, naturally, lots of chatter about the Australian Blogging Conference. (I just bought my ticket, nananananana!!).

And, then, because most of us are, indeed, members of the mummy bloggers sect, there was a limited amount of talk about Duplo, nappies, birth and feral toddlers.

Because those are the things- blogging, and being mummies (or, in one case, a mummy-to-be) that what we have in common. So that is what we discuss. Yes…?

Anyway. As you may have guessed- the title of the blog kinds of gives it away, just a little- I’m a mummy blogger. And I’m totally OK with that.

Way back when, in my parenting forum days and before I blogged, I’d vaguely heard the term ‘Mommy Blogger’. It was something I loosely associated with woman who posted boring photos of their kids, lists of what activities they planned to do that day, and a million uses for a cardboard egg carton. And, no doubt, there are bloggers who do just that. I don’t read them, but I’m sure they’re out there.

Obviously, I didn’t set out to be one of ‘those’ bloggers. I just wanted to write stuff. Make people laugh again, the way I used to. And I soon discovered there was a whole lot of other woman out there, doing exactly the same.

Acceptance is the key, I think. I blog. A lot. I’m a mum. A lot. All the time. Being a mum, is, predominantly, what I am doing with my life right now. Writing about anything else, when motherhood is what consumes my life and my days, would feel fake. And, hey, most days, I thoroughly enjoy having two kids under three years old. Other days, I’m losing my f*cking mind. I’m sure you’ll forgive me, if I need an outlet to let off some steam.

I know the way mummy bloggers are viewed, in general. On the InterWebs. In that confusing other realm, known as Real Life, where people are not so easy to pigeonhole.

I tell people, some people, select people, In Real Life, that I blog. “About what?”

“I dunno. Stuff that happens. The kids. Life. Being a mum”. And I watch them, even my nearest and dearest, roll their eyes and turn away. It’s very much the same reaction I get when, in those rare social conversations with people over the age of four, I get asked, “So… what do you do?”

“I’m a mum”.


And it’s the same, the half turn of a shoulder, the soft body language that dismisses you, denies you validation.

I invite anyone, In Real Life, who rolls their eyes and calls me a geek, to come read me. Read me. I might be a geek, but I ain’t boring. You might not like me, that’s OK. But I guarantee it won’t be because I bore you with endless photos of my children, or the Mashed Banana Monologues, the nutty nitty gritty of our daily routines. I write about mum stuff, because right now, that’s who I am, and what I do. I’m OK with that. Are you…?

I do rave about about pretty cloth nappies.But that’s a serious addiction I need help for, and we shouldn’t be laughing about it.

Where was I…? Oh yes. If you do click away from my little corner of the Web, it won’t be because I’m boring. It might be because you hate the way I write, or your sick of hearing about me doing dumb-arse stuff, or possibly because my review posts suck hard. But I doubt you’ll find me boring. My head is a fascinating place to be, and this is the place I spill it.

I always find it interesting when people jump up and down saying “I’m not a mummy blogger!”, like it’s such a bad thing. You blog, you’re a mum. The law of simple equations says that makes you a mummy blogger. What you do with that label, how you choose to feel about it (own it) is up to you. Some of the most wickedly funny stuff out there is by moms that blog, about their lives, and sometimes about their kids- mommy bloggers.

Do we even realize how powerful this label is? Mommy Blogging, in America, is a moving, seething, exploding cyber-institution. As any good review blogger will tell you, mums spend 75% of the money that comes into the household. We’re not stupid. We respect the opinions of other mothers, knowing they’ll tell us the truth when it comes to products for ourselves and our kids. We can bring large companies to their knees. We are revered on the Webs for our power to come together. To get organized quickly, to make things happen. We are mummy bloggers and we are damn scary. A whole something else. A force unto ourselves.

And, forgetting all that- let’s discuss my corporate whoring at a later date, shall we?- what about the love? What about the sharing? And I don’t mean Elmo-style. I mean having somewhere to be real, to take the piss, to talk about things that are raw, things that hurt. To confess when you fucked-up big time. (Everyone loves a big fuck-up. Makes us all feel better) To be happy and cheerful, to record your memories, your children’s lives. To write out the pain. To be self-reflective. To stay strong. To strip
yourself bare, and be brave.

That’s what our blogs are for. They are the heart and soul of us, our ups and downs, our good bits and our bad, poured out onto the screen. Shared, with people who can choose to understand, or not. Judge us, or not. Like us, or not.

Why do we feel so restricted by this mummy blogger label? Because you’re a mummy, you can’t drink or smoke or talk about sex or say the word fuck? Where did that ideal come from? Or is it just part of the wider perception we have of other mothers, of other women?

Your life has to be perfect, showing the best face to the world. Is that really what being a ‘mummy blogger’ is about?

I doubt it.

Mummy blogging, personal blogging, whatever sits best on your skin and in your mind, it’s about sharing our talent, our lives, our thoughts, opinions and ideas. It’s about women. Women like the ones I met tonight, who love their kids, and love to write and read the real lives of real people; happy cyber voyeurs with a delicious and unrestricted invite to the public yet personal scripture of other people’s mundane existence.

The Dreaded Mummy Blogger image is so deceptive. It taints the essence of what we do here. It diminishes the power of the very real connections and communities we grow, the hope and friendship and love we bring to one another.

I’m a mummy blogger.

I’m OK with that.

Us mummy bloggers, we’re kicking some arse.

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{ 31 comments… read them below or add one }

lori October 3, 2010 at 12:25 pm

Bravo! You're a bloggin muthah! Wait…that didn't come out right…


Melbourne Mumma October 2, 2010 at 9:08 pm

Loved this post! I blog about my life and my thoughts, and if that somehow defines me as a 'mummy blogger' then so be it. Like most of us I'm predominately a Mum, so hey, I even included that as part of my blog name! Even when I return to work full time, I'm still a Mum, and to me that will always be my first and foremost role in life. Why on earth should we be ashamed of that? I couldn't give a toss what people think!


edenland October 2, 2010 at 8:37 pm

This is a BLOODY AWESOME POST Lori!!!! It was so, SO fantastic meeting you last week. You're one cool chick. Now please erase all memory of me licking the chocolate bowls clean, kthx.



nadinewrites108 October 1, 2010 at 2:06 pm

You know, I've never been the 'ra-ra' type, but damned if you haven't brought a proud tear to my mummy-blogging eye! Fuck it! I'm part of the gang and I LOVE IT!

Keeping it out there, raw and real,


Bronnie and family October 1, 2010 at 7:59 am

Fantastic and so true. But I am continualy frustrated that so few Aussie companies and business do not understand the power of the mummy bloggers. They ignore us at their peril …(insert evil laugh…)


suburp October 1, 2010 at 7:24 am

you nailed it. you will find out of the 'blogging world' people will already look at you strange when you just mention you are a blogger. say, all those people that post 25 short status updates or links per day on facebook. blogging has changed and diversified A LOT over the years. I think it's still a 'cool' thing to do. and since we have become moms now, alright, so it's mommy blogging. i am happy to be a mom, and like Veronica at sleepless night said, i think we should OWN the mommy blogging label ! :)


EmmaK September 29, 2010 at 3:52 am

I heard the words churros and chocolate and came over all funny. Sounds like you had a rockin time and what an empowering post! I especially like the fact that we could bring big companies to their knees!!!


Thea September 28, 2010 at 3:50 pm

Yeah!!!! What she said! :)


Maxabella September 28, 2010 at 2:15 pm

What a FAB bunch of gals to get together. Jealous!

I have no idea if I'm a mummy blogger or not, but I don't mind either way. Whatever I am, I like it.



Jodie at Mummy Mayhem September 28, 2010 at 1:20 pm

Hon – FANTASTIC post! Loved every word of it, and loved, loved, loved meeting you.

I am a Mummy Blogger too, and I'm proud of it.

:) xxx


Bubby Makes Three September 28, 2010 at 12:45 pm

thankyou for this — BRAVO!!!!


MultipleMum September 28, 2010 at 11:54 am

Glad you had so much fun rockin' with the other Mummy bloggers. Sister A and I have our tickets for AMB conference too, so we will see you there :)


katepickle September 28, 2010 at 11:38 am

yes yes yes!

The whole 'OMG you are a Mummy Blogger' feels just the same as the whole 'oh… you are just a mum' thing.

I just don't get why people have to judge and label and look down… who cares if I am a 'mummy blogger' if you like what I write you'll ead it, if you don't you won't. If you think I have influence you'll try to get me to write about your loaf of bread, if you really value you me you might even pay me what I deserve for doing it… if you don't you won't and I'll tell you (politely of course) where you can stick your loaf of bread!


Corinne September 28, 2010 at 11:18 am

Bravo! Great post!

I'm a proud mummy blogger. Oh and I also drink, swear, have sex (occasionally) and smoke (occasionally).

So good to meet you the other day, Lori! x


toushka September 28, 2010 at 11:08 am

Fuck Yeah!!
can't wait to meet you at the conference. You rock.


Being Me September 28, 2010 at 9:05 am

I'm sorry, you lost me after churros… Mmmmmmm churros.

No, really, I completely agree. And you know what else I'd like to add about it? I'm a Mummy and I'm a blogger, yes, it's always sat comfortably with me and I love all those points you raise in your post. But you forgot one, I think: I don't get interrupted when I blog! And I don't feel ignored when I blog. Those are two fundamentally important things, I think, when you're suddenly thrust into the world of 'mummydom', particularly if you previously used to work in an office where people, like, saw you as a person? And listened to your opinions and didn't expect you to wipe their bottoms and stuff? Or is that just me?


Glen September 28, 2010 at 2:25 am

yeah but can you last more than one Summer month without putting the heating on? I doubt it – Dad Bloggers Rule :-)


Eva Gallant September 28, 2010 at 12:35 am

I guess we'd all best cover our arses: the mommy bloggers are on the way! lol


Katie September 27, 2010 at 11:28 pm

And where was I when all of this meet up business was happening? Sitting on my couch watching my husband play guitar hero. Or, possibly doing the dishes.
And ALLLL because I live on the wrong continent.


Kymmie September 27, 2010 at 11:06 pm

I don't know you that well, but I feel like I know you and love you after reading this blog entry. I'm a Mummy Blogger and proud. And I've never read such interesting stuff in all my life. And yes, you make me Laugh. Out. Loud. (And no, I will not abbreviate.) You're THAT funny. xx


x0xJ September 27, 2010 at 9:34 pm

*whispers* Thankyou <3


Mrs woog September 27, 2010 at 9:14 pm

I think I have just fallen in love with you all over again.


Kym September 27, 2010 at 9:08 pm

Thank you Lori – I'm only just starting out with my blog, and was procrastinating because I felt uncomfortable with the Mummy Blogger term. But you're right – I should own it!


x0xJ September 27, 2010 at 9:07 pm

Well fuck, i am jealous of the chocolate and OMG REAL LIFE INTERACTION??? You had! lol.
Own it, because i will shout it to the world i am damn PROUD to be a mummy. And shit, if i'm not writing about that…well it doesn't leave much to write about when i'm a mum 100% of the time and it's a pretty big job!
Plus it's always a good place to have records to go back and check "Oh when did Jimmy say his first word again? I'll just check my blog" lol.

You can always talk cloth to me. I had a serious addiction, now that the last one is a toddler and getting closer and closer to toilet training every day, i'm trying to wean myself. IT'S HARD!


life in a pink fibro September 27, 2010 at 8:54 pm

Great post Lori. Anyone would think you were a rockin' Mummy Blogger or something.


Farmers Wifey September 27, 2010 at 8:53 pm

I'm with Lucy, I want to meet you all too now!! But I am kicking some arse on my farm, mummy blog style!!


Brenda September 27, 2010 at 8:47 pm

Yep. Arse kickers! I'd take


Veronica September 27, 2010 at 8:36 pm

Exactly. I wrote about that this weekend too!


Megan September 27, 2010 at 8:32 pm

Love. It. Wish I'd been there to meet you gorgeous ladies!


Seraphim September 27, 2010 at 8:30 pm

Yep, screw it. I am a mummy blogger. It's a term. It doesn't define or own me. But it's a convenient label. And you know what? I'm proud to be a mum. I'm proud to be a writer. I'm proud I have passions and interests not limited to my role as a mother.
Mummyblogger here?
You bet your ass.


Lucy September 27, 2010 at 8:28 pm

You rock. xxx

(And fuck me, I am so jealous of the fact that you all got to meet up.)

And I love the sheer volume of cool links you have this. Off to clickety click right now.

Lori, you're a star.


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