Me and My Humungous Yogic Ego

by Lori Dwyer on March 29, 2010 · 8 comments


I mentioned last week that I love yoga. I also mentioned that I find it akin to a nice deep eight hours sleep (pre-children, of course, I don’t even know what that feels like these days), but that it makes my body hurt for the next two days. Amy from the New Adventures in DreamWorld went into her self-confessed yoga Nazi mode to remind me that if yoga hurts, I’m obviously doing it wrong.

Undeniably true. I can only imagine my yoga teacher would agree. In fact, I know she would. She has told me so before.

Apparently, the problem is all in my humongous ego.

Before I go on, allow me a elaborate a little on my yoga teacher. She is one truly astounding women. Astounding not being a word I use very often, being fussy about words in context, but it’s the best word for her. Astounding.

She is short, with unstyled hair, thick glasses, and no make up. She looks like your typical tired run down 40-ish mum. And to look at her, you may even make the mistake of calling her flabby.

Only once, but. Until you see her quite effortlessly do this.

The women’s physical appearance totally belies her strength and flexibility. As does the fact that she is completely socially awkward, and whilst a very proficient teacher, her classes can be the social equivalent of fingernails down a chalkboard if she actually decides to deviate from the script and get conversational. Thankfully, that doesn’t happen very often.

Despite the occasional social ‘drowning not waving’, she is a brilliant teacher. She teaches us mostly Vinyassa, with an occasional Ashtanga session thrown in for good measure. It was after the Ashtange session that I complained about how excruciatingly sore every muscle in my body was. Even muscles I didn’t even know I had were aching and thrumming every time I foolishly turned my neck or blinked my eyes.

Why? What had I done? Wasn’t yoga supposed to be gentle?!?

Apparently, yes. The problem here, you see, is with me. And my massive ego.

This is what my ego likes to whisper to me, mid-yogic stretch….

Go on, you can do it!! It doesn’t matter that you haven’t taken a yoga class in three years, you used to be able to do this. Go oooon. That chick over there is doing it. You can do the other poses!! Push it, push it, push it!! No pain, no gain!!

As you can probably tell, my ego bounces around in a fluoro pink g-string leotard with a ‘Choose Life’ t-shirt and a sweatband. Product of the ‘Push it till it burns” Eighties that I am.

And it’s my poodle-haired, Hypercolor-wearing fitness instructor ego that gets in my ear and makes me do things like this. The Tunnel.

Silly, silly Lori.

Ah, well. Them’s the breaks. Can’t have your zen and eat it too. My astounding yoga teacher and guarana-ed-up ego will be locked in battle for some time, it seems, until they come up with some kind of Reebok Step Xtreme Yoga for People Who Want Their Chakras With Attitude.

And let’s face it. It could be worse. Rather than Astounding Yet Awkward Yoga Women, I could actually have this guy for a teacher.

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{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

Anonymous May 30, 2010 at 4:40 am

Just want to say what a great blog you got here!
I've been around for quite a lot of time, but finally decided to show my appreciation of your work!

Thumbs up, and keep it going!



Kakka March 30, 2010 at 12:32 am

Hey, has anyone else noticed were this man's hands are? No wonder he likes his job!!! Good thing he is not my yogi – as he would be a squashed yogi by now.

Oh and Lori, good luck with the yoga – even looking at it makes my muscles sore!!


alliecat March 29, 2010 at 3:22 pm

Very funny post! It took me a while to get over my Yoga ego too, stretching, pushing, trying to keep with the ace students….time has passed and now I'm one of them! well, I am passably good at any rate, and no it mostly doesn't hurt me later.

And okay, so maybe the ego hasn't completely gone….!!


Michelle March 29, 2010 at 3:13 pm

Lori, I am so loving this side to you that I havent heard before. You are saying what all of us SAHM's are thinking.


Tenille March 29, 2010 at 2:43 pm

I joined a pre-natal yoga class when I was pregnant. It mainly consisted of some due date/obstetrician discussion, deep breathing, and flopping about on a heap of pillows. It was awesome. In my pre-kid life I did regular yoga, and loved it, but this lounging about yoga was better by far.


kbxmas March 29, 2010 at 1:50 pm

I don't know Lori. I've tried yoga a handful of times, never attempting anything remotely tunnelish, just your basic tree and downdog-type stuff, and nevertheless it has kicked my ass from one end of the gym to the next.

Personally, I don't believe it. I think yoga is *supposed* to hurt.

P.S. I've got mountain down. I'm all over mountain.


Amy xxoo March 29, 2010 at 1:13 pm

Ha ha… you would not believe it, but i am literally in the middle of writing my own post about Yoga for the latest Blog This! challenge…. and your inner Yogi sounds just like mine did when i first started ( ok, still sometime does… )


Lucy March 29, 2010 at 12:51 pm

Ahh, you make me laugh. You and your poodle-haired, Hypercolor-wearing fitness instructor ego need to get together with my personal trainer. She'd LOVE your ego…


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