I think, the next time I fall in love, I simply won’t be so busy.
I’ll appreciate things more, take time to kiss and smile and laugh more. I’ll do what I did before- iron and cook and clean, but I’ll enjoy every second of it.
Because now I know what a big hole it leaves, having no one to take care of. Having no one to take care of you.
I think I just appreciate life more in general, now.
The longer I’m here, in Paradise, the more I wonder why I was so afraid of coming back here… this place is so beautiful.
Simple pleasures, I’m finding, are the best things for a broken soul.
It’s the very simple things I miss.
Because I think, in a relationship, it’s the very simple things you take for granted, when you assume, as most people do, that you have all the time in the world.
Next time, there won’t be anything I take for granted. I’ll never be too busy writing, or folding washing, or doing a million other tiny, boring things, to cuddle or kiss or chat or have a coffee with someone- anyone- that I love ever again.
And the last thing I’d do again is let the sun go down on an argument…. what a silly thing to do, when I’ve avoided it all my life, and look at what it led to.
So many things I’ll do differently, next time…. if there is a next time.
Because now I know… just when you think you have all the time in the world…
You might not.