Hip hip hooray!!
We all know Mrs Woog, right? Sure we do. She makes the most of the mundane every day over at Woogsworld. She has a thing for high fashion, vodka, ballet flats, and has somehow coerced her husband into bringing her a cup of tea in bed every morning.
I get the distinct impression she must be really good in bed. She is funny as all get out, has a remarkable flair for blogging, a severe distaste for Tupperware, and I am just dieing to know what she looks like.
Anyhoo. Being the marketing genius that she is, she sent me a t-shirt. Because I am an idiot. It’s not entirely my fault. Who can honestly say that, at first glance, this post doesn’t make it look like she’s giving away a holiday to Thailand…?
Whatever. I love being stupid, it gets me free stuff.
And here is I, modeling my free stuff*. I’m doing my best sexy trout pout pose here. I know, it’s hot. I’ll tell the Man you said so. Because he looked at me and went “What the f*ck are you doing?”
“I’m being sexy. Show me the photo…. that’s useless. You can’t see the logo. And turn the flash off. I look shiny.”
“What the hell is that? Now you can’t see my head. And it’s all blurry. You’re really not very good at this, are you…?”
“Hurry up and take the damn….. argh!”
“What the f*ck did you do that for? I wasn’t ready!! OK, take one from the back. But get my head in it.”
Man: “Turn you head around further.”
“Do I look like a freaking Barbie doll? My head only goes so far.”
And that’s probably the best shot we got. The Man is
f*cking hopeless muchly crap at taking photos useless at following directions probably not reading this anyway very helpful. Thank you, Man.
Oh, and speaking of her Royal Woogness, guess who’s quitting smoking, with me, on October 9th…? Oh yes. Just as soon as she returns from her seven nights in Phuket that she is keeping for herself instead of giving away
(selfish bitch), Mrs Woog and I are getting narky, cranky, stabby and nicotine-free together. Stay tuned.
*Please excuse the hair. It’s the result of a home dye job gone wrong. When the hairdye box says “Dark chocolate brown”, do not believe it. It actually means skanky two-tone almost-but-not-quite-black. OK? OK. You have been warned.