by Lori Dwyer on April 30, 2013 · 46 comments

This post  comfortably bought to you by the brand new Berlei Dig Free Tights

The unexpected consequence of feeling relatively happy and contented of late is that I’ve put on about 10 kilos in a matter of weeks.

It’s not that putting on weight is a bad thing. It was probably much needed- I was beginning to look like a lollipop. I’m making some attempt to eat properly. I feel healthy. In fact, I feel pretty awesome. It was only the fact that suddenly none of my jeans fit me properly anymore that alerted me to the fact I’d put on weight at all.

That. And one of my best mates asking, unprompted, “When did you get so fat?” (Thanks a lot, Bunny. I’m sure he meant it in the nicest possible way).

And my mum off-handedly mentioning “My, Lori, you’ve put on some weight!”. She must have seen the shock on my face, because she followed that up with “It’s not a bad thing. It’s just that all your clothes are too small now, and that makes it quite noticeable…” (And thanks for that, Mum. Again, I’m sure it was meant in the nicest possible way). My mum was telling the truth- most of my pants, skirts and tights are now a size or two too small. I can only just fit into most of them. And  most days that leaves me quite uncomfortable, with big red pressure marks imprinted on to the skin of my stomach.

Looking all preeeeeeetty and dressed up.

Looking all preeeeeeetty and dressed up.

So being contacted to review the new Berlei Dig-Free Tights was timely. And certainly sweetened by the fact that Berlei seems to understand that my chances of feeling ‘sexy’ are grossly impeded by life in general- they offered me an all-expenses paid super-glam night out so I could give the tights a better test run than what they would have gotten doing the school pick up in them, or something.

Deciding to take full advantage of this, I booked a room for myself and The Most Amazing Man In The Universe at the Shangri-La hotel in Sydney. I love lush hotels, especially this one, sweeping views of the Harbour and the Opera House. We sat on the padded seats in the huge hotel room’s windows and watch balloons, released from tiny people somewhere below us, float up into the late afternoon atmosphere, high above the city skyline.

We go to a Japanese restaurant for dinner and I actually find something I eat and it’s amazing. We wander through the city streets and end up back at the hotel where we watch movies and order room service. The balloons are replaced by fireworks off in the distance, maybe from the huge cruise ship that’s just departed the harbour. Just watching them feels like taking part in some saccharine cliche but it’s lovely, all the same. The whole night was lovely, a pocket of air in the tumbling rapid that is life at the moment.

The view from the hotel room- ignore the rain. We did.

The view from the hotel room- ignore the rain. We did.

And the Berlei’s? They were pretty lovely, too. I was actually imagining restrictive tummy sucking undergarments- I’m not sure why- and that was totally unappealing, especially considering I was quite looking forward to dressing up all pretty, and feeling comfortable in something other than tracksuit pants. Turns out, I was pleasantly surprised. These are normal stockings, not tummy-tuckers; beautifully made with no front seam and a ‘smoothing’ waistband – it sits flush with your hips and waist so you can still wear tights without them being so tight that they create lumps and bumps under your clothes. They’re also tough- they survived not only the night out, but also the next day, without a single ladder, tear or hole.

Having said all that, opaque tights are not generally appropriate for the school pick up, running around after small children or hanging out washing. So I’m back to wearing one of my various pairs of a-little-too-tight, a-bit-too-small jeans.

Quite clearly, if I’m planning to keep up this contented vibe I’ve got going on… I need to invest in some new clothes for winter.

In keeping with the new policy on sponsored posts… to be quite honest, the offer of a night out valued at $500 was just far too good to pass up. Thanks Berlei.


Because I had such a good time, it’s only fair that you should have some fun too.

Berlei is giving you the chance to win…

*A restaurant dinner for two in your nearest capital city

*One night’s hotel accommodation

*Limo transfers between the restaurant and hotel 

To be in the draw to win this one, leave a comment on this blog post answering the question…

‘Share how you make yourself feel like a ‘desirable woman’?”

This competition is open for three weeks from the date of this post. One overall winner chosen from all blogs participating. Check out the full T’s and C’s here….

 Berlei Comp Terms and Conditions.


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{ 46 comments… read them below or add one }

saloma October 14, 2013 at 4:16 pm

You are really looking pretty and dressed up.Thanks for sharing wonderful post.


Julie B May 21, 2013 at 8:17 pm

Whenever I wear feminine, beautiful underwear, I always feel desirable!


Sapphyre May 21, 2013 at 5:43 pm

Well, I always feel desirable when I dress up nice, maybe show off a bit of cleavage, and I also walk with confident poise and flirt with my husband :)


Michelle Gray May 21, 2013 at 2:31 pm

To feel like a desirable women is to love yourself and believe in yourself. I look in the mirror every morning, and tell myself I love what I see and others love me too. The result, a beautiful confident women.


Catherine Tuckey May 21, 2013 at 11:50 am

It’s date night with hubby – it’s time to look hot!
Must look desirable… if I haven’t forgot!
I kick off my slippers and reach for my heels
MUMMY YOU STINK! my two year old squeals
I swap eau de nappies for some Chanel no. 5
Take off my glasses (hope hubby will drive!)
Wipe off the play-doh from my best dress
Only time to shave 1 leg – hope it will still impress!
My hairs in a birds nest, I’ll put on a hat
It’s now time to leave – where ARE my keys at?!


Sally May 21, 2013 at 10:02 am

High heeled boots, a spray of Chanel No. 5 on my neck, fresh breath… Now I feel desirable!


Lisa G May 21, 2013 at 7:05 am

Every night when hubby (of 23years) walks through the door with “that” look in his eyes. Little does he know it has taken quite a bit of time, war paint and posture control to achieve that “casual” you caught me needing you position. I desire a hero and he desires a damsel WIN, WIN.


Lauren McGee May 20, 2013 at 5:54 pm

For me it’s putting on my favourite ‘Little Black Dress’ that makes me feel like I’m a desirable woman but one big drawback of late is the unfortunate feeling that my tights and my waist aren’t in agreement ! If Berlei’s Dig Free Tights live up to their expectations my LBD will be hitting the town big-time !


Melinda May 14, 2013 at 10:56 pm

I become desirable after a few(or many) wines! At least I think I am desirable!


Karen Br May 14, 2013 at 9:23 pm

It’s just like fishing: if you select the right Berlei, they’ll be eating out of the palm of your hand! Now that makes you feel like a desirable woman!


janine g May 13, 2013 at 11:35 pm

I like to smile and give eye contact with people, from the supermarket to the bank. The response is amazing, it makes me feel so desirable that I’m making other people feel good and they always smile at me in return.


Troy Simpson May 11, 2013 at 11:36 am

I get dressed in drag :) See here:


VICKI WILSON May 11, 2013 at 8:08 am



VICKI WILSON May 11, 2013 at 8:21 am

Sorry for the ‘caps’…! Bad habit!


Melissa Creswell May 10, 2013 at 9:05 pm

‘Share how you make yourself feel like a ‘desirable woman’?”

By being confident no matter what body shape you are, every woman can feel like a desirable woman by having some self confidence. The best way is to look in the mirror and quote out loud an affirmation or stick it to the mirror to continue to remind yourself that its the inner beauty thats most important, not the stereotypical fabricated visions. We are Beautiful no matter what they say, words can’t bring us down! Christina Aguilera is very right with her lyrics. Its just a matter of more women believing in themselves.


TheEMM May 10, 2013 at 10:29 am

I’m definately of the not fond of my body category, however, a cute new hair do, or just plain swapping the thongs – of the feet variety – for ballet flats makes me feel more girly.. that and finally getting a shower that’s longer than the 2 mins the baby will let me put her down is a winner too! Lemme put that in poetry:

I’ve not had my baby for long,
My body feels all kinds of wrong,
On my feet I forever were thongs,
& it’s too cold now for sarongs (what I’m running out of material … it was sarong or bong :P)
SO swap those shoes for ballet flats,
and I start feeling all that!
Toss in a great new do!
& Suddenly the house I strut through! :)

Did I mention I have a 3 month old and I DESPERATELY need some suck it in tights?


Kelly Arndt May 10, 2013 at 4:21 am

I ignore the self-doubt and force myself to act in a confident manner. It’s amazing how, when you behave confidently, people see you that way and you start to see yourself reflected back in the same light… In romantic moments with my Husband, I act as though I am confident and self-assured, as if I KNOW that I am a sexy, vibrant woman and that confidence appeals to him GREATLY, which in turn makes me so much more relaxed in my desirability! In social situations, I try to compliment other people in a genuine fashion as often as I can and I find that comes back to me, too. It is lovely to receive compliments and nothing much feels better. Except the hugs and cuddles of four gorgeous children who remind me that the ‘few’ added kilos, stretch marks and ‘laugh’ lines are all so very worth it…


Spagsy May 9, 2013 at 4:28 pm

Gosh Lori,
I think that you being happy and feeling healthy is all that matters. I think KMart have $6 jeans. And I think it’s the season for weight gain- six kg have crept on me since Easter.

I don’t know how to make myself feel a desirable woman. I’ve been in hiding for a bit, and trying to find where I fit in in the world. But if I had to think about it, I would start with a nice hot uninterrupted shower. Some “landscaping”. Body lotion. A nice dress, Lippy, heels.
I would then close my eyes and breathe. … I think that if I got the chance to spend some time on myself then I might feel desirable? I dunno. Clearly I’m failing at this one.

I should have just stuck with what I was going to say: which is that I’m glad to come back to your blog as read that you are feeling happy and healthy. It warms my heart.

Xx rah rah


Lady Fabulous May 8, 2013 at 12:23 am

If you had asked me a week ago I would’ve said ‘Nothing, I feel like a big fat frump’! But I read some body acceptance articles, decided I wasn’t too fat to wear my favourite wedges instead of boring flats, and the second they were done, I felt sexy for the first time in gosh, I don’t know how long.

Professor appreciated the change. (twice!)


Mary J May 7, 2013 at 6:56 pm

My darling husband desires me, and that is worth so much! If I put in a bit more effort the effects are ten-fold! A couple of years ago I made a pact to wear more of what is in my wardrobe, and put on the lippy and liner on a nearly daily basis. I feel better being more together, even for the school run! Oh, and we love a lot of kisses!!


Jlo365 May 7, 2013 at 5:38 pm

Spur of the moment is the secret to make me feel desirable. Just decide ‘now’, put on something pretty, pour a glass of wine and relax. Not over thinking and no pressure.


Charmaine Campbell May 7, 2013 at 5:17 pm

You look great, younger, happy! xxxx


Natalie Dahl May 7, 2013 at 5:05 pm

I’m a single mother studying a full time dual diploma and working part time. Opportunities to get dressed up and to make myself feel desirable are few and far between. But those slim chances I get my preparation starts the night before. I wash my hair, scrub my skin till it shines and lather on the moisturiser. I rarely wear make up these days so the time spent before I go out is meticulously applying makeup, a sexy smokey eye and plump nude lip. Wardrobe choice, something comfortable, but always showing off my curves and boobs, because if you have it flaunt it. My hair often quiffed back in a funky style and finally a scotch for a little Dutch courage. I don’t get out much for some one in their late 20s, but then again I’m cash poor and a mother of an 8yo. But when I do, a babysitter is booked for the night. I pamper, prepare and primp till I feel like a fox ;)


Becc May 7, 2013 at 4:48 pm

To make myself feel desirable all I have to do is to put on some good underwear, a dress and stand in front of my husband. He goes week at the knees. Suffice to say, that is all I need :)
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Natalie Krawczuk May 7, 2013 at 4:27 pm

After 15 years with a mentally and on occasion physically abusive alcoholic husband, who took his own life two years ago and left me alone with 4 children, it certainly took a toll on my esteem and feeling desirable, but it took a very special male friend to come along and tell me I was beautiful on a constant basis that I finally could look in the mirror and like the person looking back at me, now I know there’s no stopping me I hold my head high, a positive attitude and walk with a wiggle in my step and if it happens to turn heads, then Im happy to of been noticed.


Danielle May 7, 2013 at 4:21 pm

How do I make myself feel like a desirable woman? I had to think about this…it’s been awhile since I have felt much of anything (good ol’ anxiety). But I can imagine…

It would begin with me running the shower as hot as I can stand it, I don’t have to share with little people today. I would scrub the paint from my hands and wash my hair twice. I would defuzz and lather myself in something that doesn’t have ‘no more tears’ plastered on it. I would light a lovely candle before covering myself with moisturiser I have dug out of our vanity from behind the nappies. I would wear my wedding perfume underneath a non maternity bra, I might even dig out some semi matching undies. I would straighten my hair and put on something cute. Then the last thing I would do is look in the mirror and tell myself that I am beautiful, because I know that I am, and all the goobie covered clothes and bad mum hair doesn’t change that.


Sheri Bomb May 7, 2013 at 1:09 pm

I love giving myself a pamper session. I nice hot long shower or bath with plenty of bubbles or pretty smelling shower gel, a hair treatment, a shave and all that jazz. Then when I get out I’ll slather myself in lush moisturiser, skin treatments and yummy smelling goodies before treating myself to a mani/pedi. It’s all the little details like smooth skin, silky hair, neat nails and smelling nice that make me feel desirable. Throwing on some sexy lengerie also helps!


Katie May 7, 2013 at 8:34 am

It’s funny because before having children I never thought about the how, I was a woman and was pretty sure that to some (ok maybe just a very small few) I was considered desirable.

Then I had my son and became a mum. It took me a long time to realise that I could be both a mum and a woman.

Now I take time to do the things I need to to feel like a desirable woman. I wear bright lipstick everywhere, especially places where it’s not appropriate (day care pick ups) I wear stockings and dresses nearly everyday. I don’t do it for anyone else, just me. It’s what I need to remind me that I am more than only a mum.

And yes, sometimes on my very best days I feel like the desirable woman I once took for granted.


Mumbo May 5, 2013 at 10:08 pm

From the second I got pregnant I found it nearly impossible to feel desirable. After all.. theres morning sickness, weight gain, leaky boobs, BIRTH (oh my, did a head just really pop outta there?!), even more leaky boobs, squishy tummy and .. Well, the list goes on. Finally when our son was 13 months old, I decided I’d had enough of being the ‘tootiredandhaventlookedinthemirrorindays’ woman and went out and got me some sexy lingerie. I was skeptical at first but WOW when I put it on, I suddenly became a sex goddess! The tummy was tucked away, the boobs were pushed back north after holidaying south for so long.. and wow, those stockings just hid any evidence of unshaven legs. It didn’t even matter about the hair or makeup..all attention was drawn elsewhere! ;-) Hubby’s reaction was not at all disappointing and I felt more desirable than I ever had. These days it still works a charm.. Granted, it probably only comes out once a year on valentines day..(hey- it’s quite an effort getting it on!) But the wonderful, empowering, sexy desirability it gives me sustains me the other 364 days of the year ;-)


Mumbo May 5, 2013 at 9:49 pm

From the second I got pregnant, I found it pretty much impossible to feel desirable! Finally when my son was 13 months


Marie May 4, 2013 at 5:35 pm

I feel like a desirable woman when I can wear trackie daks, or a onesie, and not have to worry about my appearance. If somebody loves you they should find you desirable no matter what you do, say or wear!


K May 2, 2013 at 11:38 am

Lori, can I just say you look gorgeous in that pic! And really, really happy :-)


K May 2, 2013 at 11:45 am

(lol…I’d probably better add that I’m not entering the competition, in case anyone thinks I’m trying to influence the judges! :-) )


Mel G May 1, 2013 at 11:54 pm

I have to confess that I don’t feel very desired at all these days, so I’m not quite sure how I go about making myself feel “like a desirable woman” anymore :( I feel I’m stuck in a rut of being the one to put in 110% effort for little or no effort in return. My husband has never been one for caressing my legs, so shaving is just personal preference; ditto sexy lingerie. Perfume makes him sneeze. Aargh!! I need help! Maybe a night away is the key….


Nan May 1, 2013 at 9:31 pm

I feel like a desirable woman when I dress up and go to a bar on my own, my husband arrives shortly after ….pretending not to know me. He approaches and introduces himself, we flirt, he offers to buy me a drink…I accept and order a decadent cocktail….then on to a romantic dinner….and then I go home with him!


CR May 1, 2013 at 1:47 pm

What makes me feel desirable is a combination of how I feel about myself, along with how I am presented. maybe a new outfit or a hair dressing appointment will help and if my man is showing me some love.
Theres nothing beter than feeling desirable and its not something I take for granted as its something I dont feel often enough. Never have, always compare myself to all those beauty queens and glamours which Im not. Im just your everyday kinda gal.
Hope your feeling beautiful Miss Lori and life being kind to you :)


Alison Kathleen May 1, 2013 at 1:40 pm

Red lipstick wins every time!


Amy@New Adventures May 1, 2013 at 8:15 am

The best way to make me feel like a desirable women? By dressing myself in red! Red always lifts my mood and makes me feel confident and sexy. So does yoga…. So maybe if I combined a yoga session followed by wearing a red dress on a date with my hubby I’d be the ultimate desirable woman!
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Julia April 30, 2013 at 11:24 pm

The only way I can feel like a desirable woman is feeling good about being me; reflecting on the things I really like about myself, feeling acceptance of the things I don’t like so much (an ongoing challenge) and feeling empowered to keep on my journey. Sounds a bit schmaltzy perhaps! But when I’m in such a place – wow, watch out world.


Michelle April 30, 2013 at 7:26 pm

I’ve recently lost 15kg, so feeling brilliant!
I make sure I am up to date with the beauty regime, hot shower, hop into ultra comfy clothes and then go somewhere wonderful with my husband! He can make me feel desirable in track suit pants!


Alicia Battersby April 30, 2013 at 7:12 pm

Having a nice, long, uninterrupted shower with time to wash my hair, scrub my skin and de-fuzz areas that are often neglected in the 2-minute-showers-incase-toddler-wakes-up of daily mummyhood. Getting dressed into clothes that actually fit me since losing 25kg of pregnancy weight with a dash of make-up and a hint of pretty smelling stuff. Topped off with a freshly brushed hair and a pair of only-slightly-high heels, that’s how I make myself feel desirable. Look good, feel good and be confident!


Miss Pink April 30, 2013 at 4:40 pm

Making myself feel like a desirable woman is entirely up to how I feel on the inside, being surrounded by people who love me for me, all in good cheer, and how I feel on the outside. I want to feel comfortable but pretty, my hair freshly done and co-operating, skin half decent, and not having one of those days where looking at food seems to make me bloat, because feeling like I look good directly affects my mood. It makes me feel desirable and not yuck, a bit like stocking lines do.


Mel C April 30, 2013 at 4:06 pm

I have been trying to lose weight to feel better about myself and to feel healthier. It’s a long road ahead. But I have found that the simple act of getting a haircut (which isn’t such a ‘simple’ act with two kids and trying to find the time to get out and get a haircut. hence my hair was down to my butt instead of at my shoulders!) makes such a difference to how you feel about yourself


Hails April 30, 2013 at 2:28 pm

Wow Lori, what a wonderful time you had! I love Sydney in the rain. It can be tricky to feel desirable with little ones, but for me it usually involves a hot shower – without children- painting my toe nails an outrageously bright colour and spritzing on some perfume. Add a bit of lippy and that’s the best I’ll be for quite some time to come!
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Lys April 30, 2013 at 10:30 am

For me it is so important to love myself first. If I take some time to celebrate my body, by getting a haircut, having a relaxing massage or going on a shopping trip for a new outfit, it is amazing how much better I feel about it on the inside, which in turn shows on the outside.
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shana rahman May 18, 2013 at 9:10 pm

I put on my deepest shade of red lipstick and smile. No man, especially & specifically my husband can ever resist not smiling back and even more so when I bite my bottom lip signalling a ‘come hither,’ look.


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