A Good Place To Start.

by Lori Dwyer on July 10, 2013 · 19 comments

Seven months in, and spending time with The Most Amazing Man In The Universe is still awesome.

It happens as often as we can squeeze a visit in, which is surprisingly quite a lot for two people who live so far away from one another. We’re both seasoned interstate travelers by now, and know every shortcut, bathroom, and dodgy food kiosk in both Sydney and Melbourne airports.

I go to him, and soak up my time in Melbourne, scarcely able to believe I’ll be living there soon.

More often- flying North on the weekend being much cheaper in flights than a trip South- he flies up to see me, and spends the weekend with my kids and I. A lot of the time we don’t even do that much. We just hang out.

But I think both of us are hyper-aware of the fact that, in another few months, the time we get to spend together as just the two of us, doing whatever we like, will be severely limited by the presence of two little people and very few babysitters.

So we make the most of what we’ve got. We spend whole weekends wrapped up blissfully in each other, the outside world fading away to an unobtrusive hum, any problems firmly placed on the backburner of life’s cooktop until we absolutely have to deal with them again.

No doubt, it’s going to suck a lot when the realisation hits that we have to do Real Life together, too, not just the fun parts. And that the fun parts might no longer be as secular and bubbled in happiness as they are right now.

But we melt into one another like butter. We revel in loving, in being in love. It’s nice to feel like a good person, and to see that feeling reflected in the person you’re with.

The Most Amazing Man in the Universe is good for me, and the effects of that are evident. I smoke less, drink more water. I eat healthier than I ever have in my life- while I can’t see myself emulating his vegetarianism anytime soon, he encourages me to take care of myself. And takes care of me, for me, when I refuse.

I’m not naive enough to think it will always be this blissful. But we’ve both come from places that allow us to see this awesomeness for what it is. Neither of us take the other one for granted.

And that, if nothing else… that’s a very good place to start.


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{ 19 comments… read them below or add one }

Hannah August 14, 2013 at 7:10 pm

Yay! I’m so happy for you and your family.

Just completed our third and hopefully final (FINAL PLEASE?!) house move in two years and loving it.

So, does the P.O.Box still work for sending you gifts? I have one I’ve been meaning to send (and losing and re-finding with each house move) and now I’ve settled and you’re about to begin the next stage of settling it seems the time to really get round to posting it!

Best of luck with the packing :-)



Lori Dwyer August 16, 2013 at 1:11 pm

Thanks so much Hannah :) xx
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Rachel July 16, 2013 at 1:31 am

So happy for you, Lori!
I’m a single mother through divorce, and marrying my boyfriend in April. The adjustment to having 3 daughters (15, 13, 10) has been a big one for him, and doing weekends and vacations together helped the transition.
So glad you found TMAMitU!


Lori Dwyer July 16, 2013 at 11:17 am

Thanks so much Rachel. Heh- the acronym doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue, does it? “TMAMitU”. I really should have thought harder about that one… :p xx
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Jen July 15, 2013 at 8:26 pm

As someone who did the long distance thing without the weekend visits, and made the big move, I am so happy for you, Lori! A few years later we’re married, baby due in less than two weeks, moving out of a flat in London and into a house-with-a-garden this weekend… and life is still just as blissful as it was when I used to get butterflies when his name popped up on Skype.

If you feel the bliss wearing off too much, don’t forget to peek back to how you feel RIGHT NOW, and you’ll find the bliss can last a very, very long time.

Wishing you all the happiness in the world, sweetpea


Lori Dwyer July 16, 2013 at 11:15 am

OMG JEN YOU ARE HAVING A BABY?!?! How did I miss this? BEcause I’m never on FB :p
All the happiness in the world to you too, lovely one- life is sounding awesome, yeah? :) xx
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Gaynor Alder July 15, 2013 at 3:09 am

… and you’re moving to Melbourne! Hello cafe catch ups. X
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Lori Dwyer July 15, 2013 at 8:41 pm

OMG YES!! Can’t wait :) Will keep you posted… x
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Gaynor Alder July 15, 2013 at 3:08 am

You had me at “We melt into each other like butter.”

He’s a keeper. X
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Cathy July 14, 2013 at 4:29 pm

I’m so glad to read of your new life. Having been there I knew in my heart that this time would come when you would look forward with excitement and not as much sadness. Much love to you both as you meld your two lives together xxx


Lori Dwyer July 14, 2013 at 10:34 pm

Thanks so much Cathy x
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Marie July 13, 2013 at 12:47 pm

You’re moving to Melbourne? Yay! I might have to stalk you, haha. It’s a great place to live. Where are you moving to? (I understand you probably don’t want to say exactly where because of stalkers, but suburbs? City? Mountains?) I’m sure you’ll be happy here!


Lori Dwyer July 14, 2013 at 10:34 pm

Hey Marie, northern city suburbs :) Feel free to stalk me- I need all the stalkers I can get! ;) x
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Anon July 10, 2013 at 7:46 pm

Best wishes with the move Lori. Although I don’t know you personally, I think you’ve made the right decision. Through your writing, you’ve just sounded so happy and positive during the last seven months :-)

And I’m soooo jealous of you moving to Melbourne. I’m now in NSW but would love to move back to Melbourne one day! There’s just something about it, I always feel so…comfortable there.

We had our first baby when we were living in Melbourne. We’ve moved interstate a couple of times since then, and added another 2 kids along the way. All our family live in other states/overseas and I won’t lie, it’s been hard at times. However, I’m kind-of proud at how self-sufficient we’ve become and have met many, many families in the same boat. I also believe that if we choose to live overseas for a bit (which we’ve been discussing) we will manage ok as we’re used to not having family support nearby.

We’re usually not that strict on routine, BUT we always get the kids (6, 4 & 2) into bed by 6pm to give ourselves time together in the evenings (I don’t mind if they don’t go straight to sleep – they just have to stay in their rooms!). Our parents visit every few months and we’ve also had them babysit when we went overseas together, so it has been possible to escape every now and then!

Anyway, Goodluck! I hope the move goes smoothly :-)


Lori Dwyer July 14, 2013 at 10:31 pm

Melbourne feels like home.

Thankyou so much- that gives me hope ;) I’m compiling a mind-list of survival tips and tricks for living interstate with littlies ;) x
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Debyl1 July 10, 2013 at 4:57 pm

Your heart is in the beautiful comforting space of love while you have your feet on the ground with life’s reality.What an amazing wonderful place to be.
I wish you both so much happiness.You bring out the best in each other and that’s what really counts.That’s what true love does.xx


Lori Dwyer July 14, 2013 at 10:18 pm

“What an amazing wonderful place to be”
That made me smile, so much. Thanks deb x
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Katyberry July 10, 2013 at 12:28 pm

Sure, real life will hit, and it WILL be different. Sounds like you know that. So you enjoy and revel in the freedom and memories that you are making now, so that you can keep them with you, and find new ways to be together – new conversations, new activities, new dreams.
We all keep moving forward, and from the sounds of it, you’re both starting from a fabulous place.
Best wishes
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Lori Dwyer July 10, 2013 at 1:07 pm

Thanks so much Katy xx
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