It Won’t Happen To Me

by Lori Dwyer on November 8, 2011 · 16 comments

in Uncategorized

In an act of serendipity kicking my bum, I happened to be offered to write a post for the Quit campaign just a few days ago. It coincided beautifully with this comment, and writing this post.

Heh. Some days, I think the universe may be trying to tell me something. Quit smoking, Lori.

If I’m totally honest, most warnings from the universe, the Quit campaign and my mother fall on my willfully ignorant ears.

“If you keep smoking, you will die.”

The big problem with that is, you see, that I am not exactly afraid of dieing right now. Yes, it would break my heart to leave my children. But I’d get to see my husband again, and I can’t perceive that being a bad thing.

But I guess the kicker here is that… I might not die. Certainly not straight away. I might live for years, in pain and unable to breath, a burden to those who love me.

Because that’s what emphysema does. In fact- lets look at hard facts here- emphysema rots your lungs. And I’ve probably already got it. In fact, if you’re a smoker, then do you.

Not that you believe that. Because one third of us smokers actually think the effects of smoking are over exaggerated.

Uh duh. I hate to say I’m included in this not too-clever group of people. I live in denial of how much I smoke, how bad it is for me, how that cough never quite goes away. How nice it’d be to be able to go for a run without gasping for breath. How old my lungs feel compared to the rest of me.

But I ignore all of that. Because, after all, it won’t happen to me.

How many smokers think that?

Me, of all people…. I should know better.

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{ 16 comments… read them below or add one }

Anonymous November 10, 2011 at 8:59 am

I agree with the commenter who suggested hypnotherapy. I know of a few people it worked for. Cancer doesn't just raise your risks of COPD and lung cancer but contributes to chronic airways obstruction, sleep apnea and if you look at recent studies on all types of cancer, it can cause pancreatic and breast cancer to name just a few. If you've ever seen someone wasting away and in pain, it helps you find the motivation to stop. Seriously, there's enough in modern life that can potentially cause cancer, dont put yourself behind the eight ball by damaging your DNA cells with cigarettes.


Kelloggsville November 9, 2011 at 9:07 am

you've got to want to do it…you looking for a reason to not smoke or to smoke, only you can decide what to do. Once you've decided you'll find something to back your decision. Good luck either way x


Melissa November 8, 2011 at 10:38 pm

From my own experience – one never "quits" smoking – one just "stops" smoking. In my humble opinion the desire and the urge never leave – you just decide not to smoke moment after moment. I could totally pick it right back up today though. For some reason this made it easier for me. I would think to myself, I'm not quitting for the rest of my life – I'm just choosing not to smoke right this moment. One moment at a time – that made it seems less daunting for me I guess.
For whatever that's worth :)
Best of luck in your quitting :)


Annie November 8, 2011 at 9:56 pm

I've lurked on your blog for quite some time now, but I tend to not comment (on any blog I read to be honest) but I'm going to drop you an email…. I hope you read it

Annie :)


Anonymous November 8, 2011 at 9:47 pm

I pray that you quit smoking, my dad smokes and I would give anything for him to stop. I am 15 and if my dad didnt smoke, then I know I wouldnt either. You are so special to your kids, I couldnt bear to see them lose you so early, just like I couldnt bear it if my dad died because of smoking. I know its a hard thing, a really really hard thing, but I pray and pray that you do quit. For yours and your childrens sake.


Motherless Mother November 8, 2011 at 8:53 pm

My Mum was a smoker from the age of 14 and one night at 57 dropped dead in the bathroom when her heart stopped. It was as sudden as that, no warning, no chance to save her. The autopsy concluded her heart valves were clogged attributed in a large part to her smoking.

I didn't get to say goodbye. Have all those last conversations you have with someone when you know their time is limited. She didn't get to see me get married or have my children. Ask all those questions you want to know about how she experienced pregnancy, what we were like as babies and children. All those questions you don't think of until they are relevant in your life. I have struggled not having my Mum around even as an adult. I am not the mother I thought I would be as I don't have the support of my Mum emotionally or physically. It not fair to my kids and if I could go back and change things I would.

Obviously I don't need to tell you about grief. As I have read your blog I have related completely to what you have written, as even though it was a different relationship I lost, she was the most important person in my life at that point and so it was and still is devastating.

My Mum tried to quit and we talked about how all her life stresses meant she couldn't do it even though she knew she should. I know it is hard to stop, but the impact of not could continue for generations.

Remember you are stronger than you think and you could do this if you want to. Good luck.


Anonymous November 8, 2011 at 2:19 pm

To all the proud, defiant smokers

Cigarettes are a wonder product. I've never heard a smoker say they've had a bad one.

Once nursed a 93 yo woman who was admitted to our nursing home on the proviso that she be allowed to continue her lifelong smoking addiction.
Heard a conversation between her and another of the nurses (who also smoked)
Young smoker Nurse: Well, smoking hasn't killed you, has it Nellie.
Old Invalid Nellie: No. But ask me about the 20 years of pain in my legs!

And – if I had $1 for every smoker patient that has to have an 'urgent' appt, that in turn delays a genuine need, simply because they think they might have cancer. I'm sorry, but it's gotta be said – you cost the health system $$$$$

Finally. Next time you have to tell your kids that you don't have enough money for whatever small treat they are asking for – ask yourself this – when was the last time you told yourself you can't afford a packet of cigarettes?

I'm no angel of light on this one!
Mrs. C


Mum’s the word November 8, 2011 at 1:57 pm

best of luck Lori.. HB has tried to quit for years.. he still hasnt succeeded and I worry about him.. its such a hard habit to quit x


Eccles November 8, 2011 at 1:19 pm

All smokers believe that it's not possible that we can get cancer, lose a limb, lose our eyesight. WRONG!! My mum, who's been overweight all her life, an alcoholic and a heavy smoker always passed medical tests with the best possible results – healthy on the inside! Good blood pressure, good lung capacity, no diabetes, 20-20 vision.
Now in her early 80's she has Macular degeneration. The tv stations are just starting to show ads for this – to get your macular checked when you have an eye test. This means that she is going blind. Mum can no longer see clearly enough to read, something that is a passion for her; she uses a torch to make everything brighter & stand out. She is unable to drive. My dad is now in hospital (age 90) & it's a 2 hour round trip to visit him, Mum is reliant on others to collect her & take her home. "I don't want to be a burden", is her current catch phrase. It's passive-aggressive I know, but that's how she feels. So, smokers DO get cancer, they DO go blind, they DO lose limbs, they DO die. Find the reason to quit & remember that you will be a "non-smoker", not someone who's trying to give up. Good luck Lori (X)


Tiffany November 8, 2011 at 11:16 am

There is a commercial in the states that my husband and I saw over the weekend that is just some guy saying over and over again how his wife didn't have to die and she was only 47. Over and over. My husband just stared at me… I'm thinking its time to quit also. And you're right, I am SO in denial that anything bad would actually happen to me from smoking… After all I'm still young right and those things only happen to old ladies. Right?


Toni November 8, 2011 at 11:15 am

No-one can really quit until they're ready — and I think there has to be something, a goal, that you want MORE THAN the thing you're trying to quit.
Quitting ciggies was easy for me. I couldn't stop smoking pot though — till I was pregnant. Turns out I love my kids more than drugs, who knew?
When you're ready, give it all you've got, Lori. You've got a cheer squad out here.


Miss Pink November 8, 2011 at 11:11 am

I am FORCING Mr Black to read this today!
He tells me often that I have "no idea". Maybe he will listen to you? But then, would you?


The Hand of a Jeanie November 8, 2011 at 10:33 am

I'm a nurse working in a small district hospital where a large proportion of our patients are those suffering Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease – COPD, a more modern terminology for emphysema. Prior to that, I worked for seven years in a cancer hospital. It is distressing to watch someone's anxiety of not being able to breathe, let alone the unpleasantness of what they cough up.

I quit not long after starting that job. Quitting is hard. But think of the sense of achievement having done it, as well as reaping the health benefits and being there for your babies.

You can do it Lori. You are worthy of being healthy as well as beautiful. xxx


Mrs S November 8, 2011 at 9:20 am

I loved smoking so much I didn't really ever bother trying to quit for a long long time. But I have quit now, and I found acupuncture worked well. It took me to make the decision to quit, get the treatment (cost just $20, once!) and it took away the cravings and craving crankies.


Lynda Halliger-Otvos November 8, 2011 at 9:10 am

Harder than hell to quit smoking. Best of luck in the quest, Lori.


Something Gorgeous November 8, 2011 at 9:10 am

Hi Lori, have you tried Hypnotherapy? Some say it works really well.
Loving your blog. x


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