After 100 excruiatingly, extremley longhours of heartbreak, uncertainity and unthinkable, unfathomable, unimaginable pain- for us, and also, I’m sure, for him, it’s over.
My Tony is gone.
This is the most painful thing I’ve ever done. My worst nightmarehas come true. I have two very small, very resiliant,but so, so tiny children who’s daddy was the light of their life. I am burying my husband, probably on Friday.
I am not yet thirty. My husband turned thrity four the day before this alll began.
I miss him, already. But we said what we had to, and I know that he was at peace, as much as possible, with what happened. He knew. That I loved him. That he was my best mate. That he was the most perfect husband, the best dad. My soul mate.
The pain is everything right now. I just need to ride. It’s awfully like childbirth, but so prolonged. The next pain is coming. This hurts like fuck. This pain will be over soon. But fucking brace for another one, Lori. Ride the waves. Hang on. Your worst fucking nightmare has just come true, and you’re living it right now.
I don’t know why I’m writing. I imagine it will strike some people as just the strangest thing- as if any of this is normal, in any way. But Ihave to write. For no other reason that it comforts me. I know Tony won’t read it- he very rarely read my blog, because he knew it was an important space for me. But he’s right here with me, encouraging me and telling me to write. Because he was so proud of me.
So.. I’m spent. Here’s the important bit. Thankyou, thankyou, thankyou. WIthj erveryhting I have. YOu have no idea how much this continued support means to me. I can’t even begin describe… this is my community. You have pulled behind me in a way I never expected. Thankyou thankyou thankyou. ANd bless you, every single person who posted anyhting, anywhere. It all helps. It still helps. When I’m unbearably lonely, when my chest might burst, this is where I come. And I cry, but it’s so good. I can’t describe.. balm for a wound, just to take the edge off the excruiating pain.
ANd I’m out. After running for 100 hours, I am preparing to crash and burn tonight. It’s all over. The absolute worst of it has passed. The rest will still be a living nightmare.
But I am strong. As I told my husband, time and time over the last few days, I am strong. I don’t know how the fuck I am doing this, but I am. One foot in front of the other. I can do this. I have to do.
Bring it on guys. No miracles this time. Just leave me love, to catch me when I fall.
{ 331 comments… read them below or add one }
Saw a link to your blog from The Bloggess. I feel sick for you.
I think writing your way through this will help you. Trying to sort through your avalanche of thoughts (when you can) is kinda like steering an ocean liner with your left foot. But it's what you can do.
I offer you my thoughts. I don't pray because I never know what to pray for.
And sleep. Find ways to sleep.
I wish I had more to give you.
so, so much love to you and your family today and every day. The waves of grief are cruel but they do subside slowly, over time. Write it out, cry it out, scream it out, and ride the waves, it's all you can do. I wrote my way through grief – and it is the only thing that got me through.
Sending so much love to you, may all our words cushion your fall and help you on your journey.
I wish you a moment of peace among the sadness.
Coming over from Eden's blog to say I'm so sorry for your loss. Hugs to you and may you find some peace in the coming days.
here from eden.
so very sorry for the loss of your husband.
there are no good words for us, but I hope you continue to find yours.
big love to you and your little ones Lori xoxox
Hi Lori,
You don't know me from a bar of soap (don't worry I don't look like a bar of soap :)) I only found your blog by someone tweeting I clicked on the link and here I am. First my deepest and sincerest love for your loss. I sat here reading this and previous posts while my two kids fought and pulled at me..I got a bit shirty with them because I wanted to read your words. I want to thank you for sharing- for writing- for being so beautiful and true to what is inside you. There is so so much love here in these posts and just over the waves that if you fall your landing will be soft on all of this love here.
I read way back- yep I read the blog posts backwards (I'm a bit perverse) and you are so beautiful in so many ways- and even from reading your posts I know you will travel through this and that the journey will always be with you-even when you are in the light- and that's not a bad thing..just how it is. This probably makes no sense but it does to me- and maybe one day it will. (then again maybe it won't…but I do feel this really strongly).
Always be yourself x
I am sending you love and light and I just wanted to share this quote which I love.
"When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight. "- Kahlil Gibran.
Dear Lori,
I am here through Eden's blog — I just wanted you to know that there's someone out here, a world away, taking a moment to hold you and your children in my heart tonight.
With love,
Pam
Thinking of you.
I am terribly sorry for your loss. I too lost my husband not long ago, it's hard, really hard but your Tony will let his presence felt around you like my Max does. He will be with you and your little ones.
You will get through this even those some days you may feel you won't, you will.
Lori,
Your friend Eden sent me over to give you my support and to let you know all of us in the blog world are here, giving you virtual hugs. I can't imagine what you are going through, how difficult this must be for you. Please know we are here for you.
My heart breaks for your loss.
I can't imagine what you mst be going through – to have lost your man, your rock, your friend and to be left to look after your two beautiful children. Thinking of you tomorrow and sending you vibes of strength to say goodbye to Tony and the strength to struggle on the journey of raising your kids, who I'm sure will continue to remind you of the joys of life and will show you glimpses of the man you have lost.
Thinking of you with all my might.
Lori, you do whatever the hell you want to get through this.
And writing is therapeutic. A very wise friend, who has also been through hell, gave me some sage advice when I went through an incredibly tough time. And that was to write. Write the hell out of. Write your way through it. No one has to see it. But just write it.
And know that people around the world love you and are here for you.
xoxo
Hi Honey, I have been away and popped on here as soon as I got home to see how things were going. I am so sorry for your loss Lori
It must feel like a canyon in your life. I send you all of my strength and loving kindness to help you through the next few days and beyond. You poor, poor petal. Much love, MM
Oh Lori, I am so sorry. Many prayers for your family.
Lori, I'm here via Farmer's Wife. Am so so sad to hear about the loss of your husband. No words I can say can make you feel better. From one blogger to another, my heartfelt condolences. Jen xxx
I am so so sorry to hear of your devastating news. Praying for you and your gorgeous children.
xo
Hi Lori, I posted something last night but was so saddened by your earlier post – sent to me by some Real Blogger friends on Facebook – that I didn't even think to scroll here and read on…. Honestly, tears are streaming down my face as I read this. I barely know you, but I so admire your courage and feel your pain. My heart goes out to you and your children. I can't even imagine your situation but do have some friends who have faced similar circumstances. I wish you healing in time, and more in more time, and even more in even more time…
-Anne Marie
Write and write and write some more, write as much as you need. Breathe even when it pains you and love, love all those around, and with, you and love those in your heart.
Sending you much love, Gayle
Im so sorry to hear of your loss! My thoughts and prayers are with you, your children and family! Be strong!
Leaving you love… leaving a hug…
tk1999
My thoughts are with you and your family at this time. And the cyberverse is here to support you if needed.
Lori, I feel speechless, but I just want you to know that you and your Chop and Bump are on my mind and I wish you some peace, comfort and the support of all those around you. Hugs.
Lori, our arms will embrace you from both near and far wherever you may be and whenever it may be. Immense love for you, for your kidlets, and for Tony.
We're here. That's the thing. We're here for you always xxx
you are stronger then you know & more loved then you can imagine.
Ive been waiting for you post to say that everything okay, and im so sorry that this has happened to you & you little ones.
we'll always be here to listen to you and send you love.
love.x.
I have stopped by from Nikki's blog and am so very sorry for your loss. Know that there are many, many prayers being said for you and your family. My heart just aches for you and your two little ones. Be strong and take care of you. Sending love and strength…
Jeanne
Lori, I am so sorry for your loss. You & your family have been in my thoughts & prayers since I first heard the news on twitter.
We all prayed for your Tony & hoped he would recover. My heart goes out to you & your children,this is indeed a very sad time for you all.Sending you love & light to help you get through this difficult time.
I am so sorry Lori. So very sorry for your loss.
I have heard your sad news through many fellow bloggers sending their love your way and wanted to send my condolences to you. I cannot imagine your pain but this post made me really feel it. Keep writing and do what you need to do. You are not alone we are all right here with you. Thinking of you at this hard time x
I'm so sorry to hear this. May he rest in peace.
Lori,
I am so sorry for your loss. I wish we had 'met' under better circumstances, in happier times. I'm sure there are no words to ease your pain, lessen your loss. And regardless of the circumstances your husband was clearly a wonderful husband, an amazing father and the love of your life. Nothing will ever change that. Ever.
xoox
My prayers are with you and your children. I almost lost my son to a cycling accident this year but my situation turned out the opposite to yours. Even with that experience I still can't imagine what you must be going through. God bless you and I hope that peace comes to you.
I don't know you Lori but I certainly know that I can leave some love even to someone I don't know. For the heartache that you are going through I know that you may find some solace in the love that is being sent to you on these pages.
Be kind to yourself
love and prayers to you and your boys
Sheree
I'm so very sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Love to you from someone who has only found you through this awful, painful time and the links from the oh so many people who love you. x
I am at a loss for the words that can give you any comfort at a time like this?
May your strength and your little family see you through the worst of this tragedy.
Though you do not know it now, and though you may never feel whole, eventually some part of you will be okay again.
Lori, I'm so sorry to hear this. I'm sending good thoughts your way – it's not a lot, I know, but I hope it helps, even a little.
I'm so so sorry to read this, my thoughts are with you and your little ones
XxX
I am so sorry for you. I am crying for you, even though I don't know you. I do understand your pain though. I lost my brother a few years ago in a car accident. He was my very best friend and only 25. One day he was there, the next he was gone. I feel my own pain again through your sadness and I am so sorry you have to go through this. Just take one day at a time. Some days will be much harder than others. Take whatever help you can get. The world can be a very unfair place and I am so sorry for you.
sending love and wisdom from california. bless you all.
Lost for words,…. hold on tight to your littlies and stay strong xxxxx
Sending you the biggest hug I can throw around you guys – with much 'much' love,
Nina xxx
I just found your blog through marketing to milk. We are here for you . To hug u, catch u and hold u.
Dear, dear Lori
I wish I could put my arms around you and hug you, but I am on the other side of the world. All I can do is join with everyone else and surround you with love and prayers via your blog.
God bless
Stella xx
Dear Lori,
I am so sorry for your loss….I can't imagine the pain you must be going through right now. I am sending you all my love all the way from the Netherlands.
Love, Wendy
Lots of love being sent your way. And squeezy hugs and thoughts of comfort. I can't fathom this, but I feel it regardless. We're here for you.
i am so very sorry that you and your family are enduring this pain. it's a pain i know very well, and i can tell you that some day it won't be this bad, and i also know that that's not much help right now. you are in the thoughts of a great many people.
Lori, I've just returned from holiday and caught up on your very sad news. One step at a time hun, you're doing so well. Just keep remembering, one step at a time. I completely understand your need to write, and believe it can help the sense of unreality and loss. Wishing you so much love and my prayers. Vix xxx
I am so sorry for your loss. I can't think of anything else to say right now.
Unbearable loss I understand Lori, God gives you strength and courage for your little ones… You will be in my prayers… May God bless you with all HIS blessings and shadow of peaceful life… Ameen
http://craftaworld.blogspot.com/
Love
Farah
Lori, I don't know what to say. Sending you love and strength.
Sending love and strength to you and your family xxx
My prayers are for you and your precious children.
Chris
Lori my heart and love go out to you. Take strength from the love that surrounds you. Although words don't ease your pain they may shine a small light xx
Lori, I don't have the love you need, but I am praying God sends it to you and wraps you in His loving arms, and that you feel it, that He is there, loving you in this horrible, horrible time.
Lori, thankyou for opening your heart and feelings to us – you have great support around you and I know it is not going to be enough some days because you are the one living this – but please know we care about you and want you to find peace. you know we all would encourage you to write it out – to let it go some days and to be able to walk away – remember you have a space to dump your feelings and that you will always find the support and encouragement you need. my heart goes out to you and your cherubs. naomi xx
Whenever you need us Lori, we'll be here.
All of us. Always.
Big love and hugs to you and your babes, Lori. You will always be well looked after – For now, just ride that wave. Let it out. I haven't stopped thinking about you for the past 48 hours. None of us have.
One day at a time.
You are amazing.
xxx
Louise
No comment could possibly say all the right words, who could ever have the words to say, to make it better? It is what it is. This is what the universe has brought to you, and you are right, you must just live it. You will get through, and you will be the most amazing strong woman at the end of it. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, one step at a time, you will reach it.
Love to you and your family… xoxo
Lori
You're in my thoughts today here in England. I'm so sorry for your terrible loss and wish you strength and stamina for your new journey.
With much love and a heavy heart, pamela xxx
Lori, my heart and thoughts are with you and your children. Sending you an abundance of love x
My heart breaks for you and your babies. Praying for strength and compassion to pull you through.
My thoughts and prays are with you and you little ones xox
You are all our thoughts, courageous Lori. Be brave, darling you. x
Arms are wide open to receive you Lori and your little ones. To give you comfort when you need it, to be your shoulder to cry on and whatever else we can do. Just take one day at a time, you are strong and you can do this Im sure.
xx
I am so sorry for your loss. Hang in there.
Wishing you love and the strength to get through this most awful time. I am so sorry for your family's terrible, terrible loss. XXXXXX
Lori – so much love to you and your babies. You being here, writing, makes perfect sense and I hope it helps in some small way.
You are amazing and strong.
And we are all here, with our arms out, waiting to catch you and hold you close.
I'm so sorry for your loss! I can't begin to imagine how you must be feeling. Write any time you want to: we're here to support if we can. Stay strong x
words are incredibly inadequate at times. Thinking of you and your family and I hope your husband is at peace
I am so sorry for your loss. Noone can imagine what you are going through. I hope this strong community to help to support you in some way.
Do whatever makes you feel in any small capacity less overewhelmed, I don't want to say better as I can only begin to imagine that you won't feel 'better' for a long time.
You have so much beautiful support here and outside the blogosphere. You'll get through it one second at a time I can only hope for you and your family that at some point in the future that your broken hearts can begin to heal. from my family to yours, Carax
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your children xxx
My heart hurts for you Lori, your heart will hurt much. much more and for longer. But it WILL get better. x
Lori, I am so, so sorry for the sudden loss of your husband Tony. You have been in my thoughts constantly over the last few days and I wish love and strength for you and your adorable kids in the future.
Karen
Lori, I cannot begin to imagine what you're going through. Although we have never met, I'm thinking of you and sending you love and strength.
I am so so sorry Lori. I am thinking of you and your sweet ones.
Loads of love and strength for you and your babies.
Thinking of you.
Lori, I often read your blog, I love the giggles you give me. You have such a way with words. Only now I feel compelled to comment you. As I have done elsewhere as well.
You have done Tony the biggest honour of all. You were his wife and his soul mate. You are the gorgeous Mummy to his babies.
This path is going to be a long and hard one, but huni you can do it. There is no choice but right through it, with your babies by your side.
You are surrounded with love and support. Please be sure to use that at any time. Never be too proud to say I need a hand.
One day at a time sweety.
My thoughts and prayers are with you always. xxx
Lori, I struggle to know what to write as no words are enough. Thinking of you and your babies in this truly devastating time. Much love to you all xxx
Leaving you lots ans lots of love…I am so terribly sorry. xx
I am so sorry for your loss Lori. Thinking of you and your family and sending you much love and strength. xx
So sorry for your loss, Lori.
I completely understand your need to write. Blogging helped me through some terrible grief.
Much love.
xx
Lori,
I was pointed here from another blog. Im so sorry to read of your loss. Your pain immeasurable. Thinking of you even though Ive only just met you.
oh lori. i am so sorry. i cannot even comprehend what you must be feeling. sending much love..
also, i know it seems odd but, is there anything i/we can do? i mean physically? please don't hesitate to get in contact if you need something. i am in sydney if that's at all helpful..?
You my my unconditional love and support. xx
So much love to you Lori. So many people have said it more eloquently than me, but you are loved & don't have to be strong for all of us. Do what you have to to get you through. Thinking of you. Xxxx
Do what you have to do to get through Lori. Much love.
Lori, I just stubled upon your blog. It is heart wrenching. You shared the raw pain of your heart. Tears are still streaming down my face from it. Let God love you and carry you… I am still praying, but for you and your 2 little ones. May the tears you shed cleanse your wounded heart and in time allow the healing to begin.
be it one word, or 1000, write. Write.
Not only will we catch you when you fall, but we will cry your tears with you and wrap you in a warm hug.
xx
Lori, your strength is a true inspiration. I know that you will have some dark times, but please remember that people are there for you. My heartfelt sympathy to you and your family
We don't know each other – but I have learned about you after this first happened. I'm so sorry. My heart aches for you. Take every day one step at a time. Be good to yourself, be patient, be strong. Draw strength from your children because that love is the purest strength there is. You will get through this.
Sending all of my love, hope and prayers. You are not alone I will think and your family often, I promise you that xx
Lori, you get through this the best way you can. There is no formula, no standard path to follow. The pain doesn't relent and no-one can judge you for how you deal with that. When my sons died I talked & talked about them to anyone who'd listen. My (now ex)husband never said a thing. We deal with things as individuals. Just be there for your kids, remember Tony with love & make sure you get some time where you can fall in a heap & cry when you need to.
Thinking of you & your family at this sad time.
This was the news I hoped would never be read. I hope that you come through this an even stronger person that you are already. You are an incredibly brave woman and once Friday is over your journey to recovery can really start. You and your children have Tony as your guardian angel now and I hope you at least find some small comfort in this. Please know that you have so many people out here thinking of you. We may not be real life family but we are an online family, we will listen to everything you want to say whether it be good or bad. Never feel like you are alone, we are all here and I am sure if you asked, any one of us would do anything within our power to help in any way we could.
Love and Hugs to you all
Colleen
Lori, adding my tears to the river that flow around you, a strand to the safety net that will catch you, and all my love. I have only ever known you through the screen, but you've always meant a lot to me, and I grieve with you now.
Keep writing as much as you need to, and I will be here to listen and help you through this in as many ways as I can.
Lori, my love and prayers are being sent to you and your children. You are not alone.
Leaving you and your boys my love, and holding you all in the light.
Lost for words. I can't even begin to imagine what you are going through and still, my heart hurts for you and I have tears running down my face. Sending you lots of love.
Lori..
No words can express how your story has touched me.. My thoughts with you always.. Your beloved Tony lives on in your Children..
Nicole xx (lifesothercatastrophes)
(¯`·.·´¯) (¯`·.·´¯)
`·.¸(¯`·.·´¯)¸ .·
×°× ` ·.¸.·´ ×°×
~LEAVING LOVE~
Leaving you love xx I am so sorry for your loss.
Oh Lori, I am so saddened by this and feel so much for you and your family. Your star is so bright and you are strong so you will come through it, it's just so unfair that you have to. I'm thinking of you and sending love and a huge hug, Melissa xx
Lori through your words I can feel your pain, I wish there was some way I could take it away from you and your children. Thinking about you all the time.
cheezelMonster from BB
Crash and burn. We are with you. Always. Always. Always.
I am so sorry for your loss… Sending you nothing but love and strength to help get you through the coming months xo
I am so very sorry, Lori. I wish I could fast forward you to a time when the pain will be lessened. It's not strange at all for you to come here and write. You do whatever you need to do to get through this. You obviously have a lot of people who care about you, so don't be afraid to lean on them. Love to you and your family.
I am so, so sorry for your loss. I will hold you and your family in my heart now. Many prayers….
Wishing you peace in the coming days, weeks, and months as you grieve. I am so sorry for your loss, Lori. I hope all the best for you.
Lori, I read about you through Wanderlust. I am sending strength for you and your family.
Oh Lori, you are amazing. Your strength is something admirable, and i know you can get through this. Will it hurt. Yes it fucking will, but like you said you just have to ride the waves, and you are doing I am sending you and your children so so much love and strength, take from me what you need and in those lonely moments remember there are so many of us here for you any any time at all.
<3
No words, just thoughts, tears and love for you and your family, from me and mine.
Leaving you TONS of love..you and your little ones are in my thoughts
xxoo
You are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm so deeply sorry for your loss. You sound like you've got an amazing strength which you can feel just through your words. Thinking of you and your family.
RIP Tony
Xx
Leaving you love, Lori. And huge hugs. xox
So so sorry that this has happened to you Lori. I want you to know that I've been constantly thinking about you and will continue to do so. You ever need to unload anything you feel you can't otherwise you know my email address. I know I'm not just round the corner, I know we've never met in person, but know you'll get an ear, or whatever you need from me.
So sorry for this terrible loss. You will never get over it but you will get through it.
Much love,
Gillian xxxx
(((((hugs))))))
I'm so sorry for your loss Lori. ((hugs))
Lori, I am just adding my love to the rest of the pile, I hope it can carry you in some way.
Lori, I have never met you however, please know that I and the entire blogging community are behind you 100%! There is nothing that we can say or do to make a profound difference to your life at present but we can stand strong beside you, give our love and support and just be here to help catch you that little bit. All my love and best wishes at this unthinkable time. Sophie.
Lori, Our thoughts and prayers are with you during this time. The blogging community is amazing and you have many bloggers aound you for support and love.
Love to your little ones and your extended family during this time.
Hugs Kylie
Sending all my love to you and your babies, Lori. Just take it one minute and one breath at a time… I am so sorry for your loss.~ xx
Thinking of you and your beautiful family, in what is your darkest hour. May you find some light from the love and support of those around you. xx
I have no words – just wanted to let you know you are surrounded with the most amazing people who will always pick you up if you fall. I am so sorry Lori…my thoughts and love go to you and your family x
Oh Lori, words are not enough, but just know I am thinking of you.
Lori, You and your babies have been in my thoughts and prayers for the last few days since I came across this part of your journey. May you find love at every turn, may you have the grace to wade through this dark and terrible time. May the waves of sorrow bring with them moments of joy at the memories and the love you share.
May you always be surrounded by the shoulders of loved ones to cry on and may you have a deep peace inside the turmoil.
With love and prayers for the journey. Miriam
So sad Lori. I am holding you and your family in my heart now and hoping you get the strength you need to carry on through this. The online community is here to catch you.
You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers … keep putting one foot in front of the other.
Lori,
You are such a strong person – it is unimaginable to me as to the pain and sadness you must be feeling at this time.
Look at the faces of your kids and take strength from the fact that they are forever a symbol of the love that you and Tony share.
I'm sure nothing anyone can say, will help you make sense of this at the moment – but just know that there are so many on us out here in the blogging world sending you and your kidlets love and support.
So sorry hun
xoxoxoxox
Lori, I am so incredibly sad for you and your family, it`s heartbreaking, I have tears in my eyes. Thinking of you all xx
Oh Lori.
That's all I can say.
I have no other words. Only tears. Loads and loads of tears. For you. For the kids. For Tony. For me. For my husband. For my kids. For those that have gone before. For those that will one day go. For all the love and all the loss. For all the hurt. For all the joy. For all the confusion that it all brings. For the absolute hole it leaves. For the sorrow …
Oh Lori. I am just so sorry …
I have no words.
Thank you for posting. It means a lot that you have trusted us.
Big hugs
L
Thinking of you and the family – blessings to you all xx
Love, prayer & internet moms around the world uniting to digitally hold you and offer your their comfort. We are all with you.
lots of love and prayers with you xoxo
Words can't express Lori. Thinking of you all.
So sorry.
Like everyone else I have tears. Keep writing… It really is the best therapy. It will help you sort out your feelings and help you ride those waves. It will take time. Make sure you take all the time that YOU need. We'll always be here for you.
Sending you hugs… Sam x
Lots and lots and lots of love and big, big hugz from me to you.
You are never far from my thoughts. Although you are strong, allow yourself time to be soft too. Don't be afraid to ask of others, for help in whichever form you need as you walk, one slow step at a time, through the days to come.
Sending love x
Hugs to you. So many hugs. I don't know what else to say. xoxo
So very sorry for your loss and for your children's loss. There are no "shoulds" for grief. You do what you need to do whenever you need to do it to keep going for yourself and for your family.
I am a new follower and I learned of your tragic loss from PinkPatentMaryJanes. I know I'm a stranger, but just know my heart goes out to you and your family. You are in my thoughts and prayers
Fourth Grade Nothing
I am here via Babymac and I, like the many others here and sending you bucket loads of love and prayers for you and your children xx
Writing is such a good outlet, such good therapy. So much better than keeping it all inside. So keep writing, don't worry what others think.
This will be a long rough ride. It will not end tomorrow. But don't even think about tomorrow. Just think about the next breath.
Yes, Tony is at peace now. I hope that does bring you some comfort. And know that he trusted you to be OK, he trusted you to do what you need to do to make sure the children are ok.
One minute at a time…
sending love from my family to yours we are deeply sorry for your loss xxx
hi Lori – I am another complete stranger.
Your loss is unspeakable and I have no words for you except to say that you must let all this love support you.
I have a dear friend who lost her husband at 40 last year she has a 1 year old daughter.
Based on her experiences can I suggest the following (and please don't think me presumptuous) (1) make sure you find a good counsellor. You need to make sure that you have someone to vent to and to help you through this for the next 12 months. Often the shock does not hit until after a few months and at that time a lot of people think you are 'over the worst'. It is important to prepare for that. (2) appoint someone to filter phone calls emails letters etc so you don't have to deal with it. Also appoint someone like a friend or family member to take over manage all the admin paperwork you will have to deal with. (3) make sure you keep the children with you unless you have someone they are used to being with as being separated from you may make it worse. (4) cry as much as you need to.
I am thinking of you and I am so so sorry for what has happened.
leaving you lots of love & strength Lori ♥
I'm just in tears. My heart hearts so much for you.
Continuing to pray for you and your amazing little ones.
Sorry for your loss Lori
Leaving you love.
Wrapping my arms around you like everyone in this amazing community. We will hold you and give you the support you need whenever you need us. Sending love and light to you and your gorgeous children, Bianca x
Lori, this whole thing just sucks. I'm so sorry any of this happened. I remember saying to you when this all began that I knew what you were going through. Now, I can't imagine how you must be feeling ((HUG))
But, I can imagine that the things you'd need to do right are now small things: eat, sleep, talk to your loved ones when needed. Just like when you were in labour, you didn't take on the whole labour at once, you just took each pain as it came, I'm sure the early days would be like this.
We all just wanted to make Tony better, and we're all so sorry we couldn't. But just remember, we're here for you if you need us.
And we all will love you through this.
my heart breaks for you in your loss.
the Lord will sustain you in every step you must make, just trust Him.
::hugs::
Keep strong, but be true to your feelings. You will know within when your strength is needed and when you can just fall apart.
My thoughts are with you
I am so, so sorry for your loss Lori – and I totally understand why you've posted. Hopefully this can help be the mildest buffer for the pain and help you through the next few days and beyond. Much love to you and your children xx
I'm so very sorry for the loss of your soul mate. Please stay strong. Will keep you and your family in my prayers. Love, lots of love to you!!'
I'm so sorry for your loss, Lori.
I can feel your pain through your words, even though I don't know you.
Wishing you strength to get through the pain and torment that you are feeling right now, and will be feeling for a long time.
Sending you loads of love from the other side of the world, may it gather speed as it travels and knock you off your feet and carry you through this. xoxox
I am so so sorry. You are amazing. What you wrote is amazing. I just don't know what else to say. I cannot imagine the pain. Love to you and your precious ones.
Such sad news, Please take care of yourself, take help when you need it, and know that things will get better. xo
Keep writing my love. Do what you need to do to ease the pain. We are all here holding you, giving you love and strength.xxxxxx
Lori,
Leaving you love and light. Wishing you peace and strength.
Lori, so very sorry for your devastating loss.
xoxoxo
I am so sorry for your loss Lori xx
Sending you love. So much love. Wish there was something else I could do…
Indeed you are strong. Indeed you will get through this. And he will always be with you.
May you be comforted with the knowledge that his life has impacted many, and there will be so many of us holding our little ones, and partners closer, because you were brave enough to share your story.
"Time spent with someone we love, will always be too short."
When all words fail, we borrow from another.
"In the depth of your hopes and desires lies your silent knowledge of the beyond; And like seeds dreaming beneath the snow your heart dreams of spring. Trust the dreams, for in them is hidden the gate to eternity." Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet.
Prayers for you, your children and your beloved Tony from me and my love. And still, always wishing you all peace. Watershedd and her GOFA.
Lori,
thats right tiny steps one foot in fron of the other,we all will catch you when you fall we are one tight blogger family community.Take as much time as you need to grieve You are a very strong women Lori . I will continue to send love &strength; to you and pray that you and your babies are all fine<3
xox
All my love and thoughts are with you. xox
Loce, love and love to you and yours. Your precious children, your families and friends. I am so, so sorry for your loss Lori. Peace to you. xox
If you need a heart, mine is yours to borrow. I can't imagine how much pain you are going through right now. Sending love to you and your kids.
I am new to your blog after reading updates about you on so many other blogs I read, but I couldn't stop by without saying how terribly sorry I am. My heart is broken for you.
As someone who has also been through a soul-shattering grief, I am sending all the love and support I have to you to keep getting through each day.
I'm just so sorry this has happened to you.
Sally (Melbourne)
When you need to let go, when you fall, we will be here, we will catch you.
Sending love, strength, support x
What you are going through seems unfathomable, but I know another young woman who lost her husband – the love of her life – suddenly, although she didn't have children. Everyone thought it would be best if she went back to work and 'got on' with her life. She was ok for a time then fell apart.So what I'm saying is take all the time you need to grieve. If anyone says to you down the track that you should be 'getting over it' now, ignore them. You are entitled to take as long as you like. It may be years, but one day a day will come when you feel ok. Sad but ok. And you will always have your lovely children. Take care xx
You ARE strong, undoubtedly. But when you need to let go, we are here to envelope you, prop you up, keep you safe, give you comfort.
Sending lots of love & light to you and your littlies…
Dearest Lori,
I admire your and am in awe of your strength, I am devastated by your loss, and you are constantly in my thoughts as you have been these past days.
Continuing to send you my love, strength and support xoxox
Oh, Lori – sending you all the love and courage I can muster. So sorry to hear about your loss … i know it will continue to hurt for a long, long time but know that you are surrounded by love. xx
I'm sorry for your loss, Lori – my thoughts are with you and your family. Mrs Woog expressed it better than i could http://www.woogsworld.com/2011/01/no-words-left.html
We will catch you when you fall & carry you when you feel like you can't go on.
Love you lots xx
not strange at all that you are writing here. I can't find the words to express how much I am saddened by Tony's passing. I have cried so much. Sending all the love and light and hugs from my family to yours. This support will continue Lori, because I know the nightmare continues for you. I think as a community we are holding out our arms to catch you as best we can. As cheesy as that sounds – it's true.
It's all been said, and beautifully. So all I can add is that I am here too. xo
I'm so sorry to hear this Lori.
My heart is heavy, my eyes filled with tears.
I am praying that you and you're beautiful children get through this, you're a strong amazing woman.
xx
Lori, all my heartfelt love to you. Writing doesn't seem weird to me at all. You must continue to do what feels right for you during these next months. Keep listening to your inward voice. xxxxxx
Lori, I am so deeply sorry for the loss of your Tony. You have my love, my strength and my thoughts. Write what you want, what you need to, let writing be one of your comforts, we are all quietly here for you. Kia kaha.
Leaving you my love. May this blogging space provide you with all the support and solace you need. x
Lori,
You are all in my thoughts and prayers! Keep doing anything that helps you cope. Write, scream, hug your children! Please know that although I'm in the US, I'll be here to catch you!
Shelly
I am deeply saddened for you and your family, Lori. My thoughts are with you. You have a wonderful community around you to support you, you will get through this!
Lori, I'm leaving you love. I am so, so sorry for what you're going through and if blogging gives you some sort of solace, then by all means continue.
You're in my thoughts.
Yes Lori, you are right. It is simply one foot in front of the other. Survival now is all. Cry hard,rage, shout, remember vividly and take the support your cyber-community offers.
My thoughts are with you and your babies.
Oh Lori,
I'm so, so sorry. Keep breathing, keep writing and keep hugging your little ones.
Wishing you God's peace at this time.
xxx
Lori we are not here to judge you, you grieve in the only way you know how and the best way for you. We are here for support, I am here for support and I know you are strong, but I wish you more strength and peace as you continue your journey. With love, Christie xx
My prayers are with you and your family… I am so sorry for your loss. You are strong, and you have a strong support system behind you to help you through the times ahead. I am so thankful that you have a place like this to share your feelings, and I pray that you will always use it and be comforted.
Lori – I am so sorry that Tony passed away. No words can bring the comfort you need right now.
Love,light & strength for you and your precious babes. x
love, love, love and more love for you and your children Lori.
And you know how you said you were going to ride the waves? Well when you get tired of the pain, ride the waves of support you have here, and elsewhere. I can almost promise you they'll make for a much better ride…
Lori, I can't express how sorry I am for you and your two gorgeous kids. The one thing that stands out in my memory of meeting you is your warmth and kindness.
I'm sure you are surrounded by friends and family who love and care for you at this time, but as Eden said, use your writing and the support of the cyber community to help you get through this. You said that Tony knew this was 'your place' and it is. When we met, we talked about how we blogged because it's therapeutic. And it is. So I completely understand why you're writing. Keep writing. Even if you don't hit that publish button.
If you need anything at all, please just say the word. xxx
We're here, Lori. Sending you enormous amounts of love.
xx
With tears streaming, feeling your pain, I read this post and my heart breaks for you. I know you are strong, the countless blogs of yours before show me such an inner strength within you. This community adores you, we will never let you suffer in silence.
And above all, please, keep writing. May it act as a balm to your searing soul and release the pressure from within. Your Tony will be proud, we are all proud. You are brave and beautiful and we walk with you every second to help ease the pain xx
sending you so much love and healing vibes. Praying that you find reserves of strength you never knoew you possessed to get you and your kids through this terrible time. xxxxxxx
Much love to you Lori. Eden is right; one breath at a time.
It isn't at all strange that you've come here to write. You've always been very honest with us, and you know we're here to support you. Take care, and hold your babies close. xox
Oh Lori you have been given a very heavy cross to bear so let as many people as possible help you carry it. Your children are very lucky to have such a strong mum to bring them through this – I just hope you have someone strong to lean on too. Sending you love and prayers. Kate
I am so so sorry, I don't know you and I just jumped on a link from another blog.
I woke up this morning feeling a rather large panic about Mr Stinky and this sort of thing, so while I can't profess to know how you are feeling, I am sat here with tears reading your last week.
I'm sending love for now and the next however long for you and your kids.
Big big love
I am so, so very sorry for your loss.
Sending you and your little ones much love, I'm so very sorry.
Oh Lori, I am so sorry. I have been thinking about you and your family since I first read about this. You are amazingly strong and you will get through this with your amazing kids by your side.
Here is all the love I can send you. Stay strong.
Much love to you and your beautiful babies Lori….May you find some sort of solace in the messages we leave, and may Tony's love guide you through this horrible living nightmare. You are so very very strong and i will take with me from this tradgedy your strength and determination
Lots of love to you beautiful lady
Gill
xx
Lori, I don't even know what to say. I had just found your blog a week or so before this, and took the opportunity to follow you on Twitter. I was thrilled to get a follow back! I think one my worst fears has just become your reality, but I have seen your strength over the last few posts, and I know you will make it, with help and support from your family and friends, and yes, this amazing virtual community we are all a part of.
To my high school best friend,
I have cyber stalker this page as well as Emma's like a creep, wishing, hoping, praying.
You do not need a miracle, my sweet, you have the astounding strength and calm that I notice radiates from you.
You found your calling as a Mother, it replaced the teenage Lori I knew, with the enlightened Women you have become.
Use every medium you wish to your aid, my hands are another set, still ready to soften the fall.
Love always KT Greco
Lori you are so strong. I truly admire your bravery. And I'm so sorry this has happened to you. My thoughts are with you and your little ones. Love and Light xx
Lori I'm so sorry. I came over from River's blog, she's a dear blogfriend and posted about Tony losing his fight. I was widowed (still can't stand that word) at 30 with a 2 year old and a 4 year old and the pain is horrendous. You're right, life goes on and children need their mother but right now, it's an awful ordeal and my heart goes out to you. Rely on good people around you to help you through this. I'm very sorry for your loss.
I am a stranger, new to your blog, via a tweet from a mutual friend, and my heart is broken for you. Many prayers and many hugs and most of all, lots of love to you and your family.
I don't know your back story but I was referred here from Twitter and wanted to say I'm sorry for your loss.
Lots of prayers and love for you and your family.
So sorry for your tragic loss.x
We have all been waiting and I am so glad even through your heart ache you have taken the time to come here. Everyone is thinking of you and sending you love. Tony will still be alive in memories and funny stories you will tell the children. But I know your heart is broken right now and I am crying along side you. **hugs**
saying "i'm sorry for your loss" just doesn't seem enough. My heart is breaking for you and your family. Sending love and prayers your way. *hugs*
Lori, I'm sitting here in my home in Canada reading this feeling so saddened. I am also a SAHM and have two wee ones. I cannot even begin to imagine what you are going through at this moment. I am so very sorry that your Tony is gone. If there is anything I am taking comfort in right now it's that you have such a supportive community of friends on this blog and you have two little ones who will continue to give you so much reason to forge ahead each day.
Please keep writing as it seems that it will play a big part in the healing process for you. You know that you are being listened to and cared about even as far as Canada.
Sending you and your little ones much caring thoughts and feeling hopeful that things will get better as impossible as it may seem at this moment.
Oh Lori, I am so sorry. I wish I had some right words but these words are for you:
"Love is stronger than death even though it can't stop death from happening, but no matter how hard death tries it can't separate people from love. It can't take away our memories either. In the end, love and life are stronger than death."- Anonymous
Hugs to you and your kids. You will be in my prayers.
There is nothing that I can say to you my sweet friend to ease the pain that you are feeling. Know that I am praying that God graces you with strength and peace to make it one step at a time.
Know that I am here for you. Lean on me my friend.
xoxo
My heart goes out to you, I can't imagine how you feel. Huge love and support for your impossible situation.
Lori, I have a post up in your honour. In honour of the wonderful man who was your husband.
I won't pretend I can understand how you are feeling but just know that I am here for you in any and every way possible. You are one of us, and we don't let our own suffer in silence. We will be behind you every step of the way.
Much love to you, Chop and Bump x0
Dear Lori
I am new to your blog but have been following the news through bellybelly. I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. My heart breaks for you and your children.
As someone recently bereaved I have some idea of the chokingly horrendous pain you are in now. There is no getting over grief. Sadly we just have to muddle through. I hope all the love and support you have helps you get through each hour and day ahead.
Write, scream, cry, do whatever you have to. Thinking of you
Tash, Melbourne
I am so sorry Lori. I only recently found your blog, but your strength and honesty is just amazing. I am sending you and your babies love and strength during this time that really no words can do justice.
xxxx
As you say: one foot in front of the other, one second at a time, one tear and then the next. They're cliches Lori, but you will get through. We are thinking of you, and if you can be strong for someone you've never met on the other side of the world, we are being strong for you.
Lori,
I cannot begin to tell you how terribly shocked I was to find out about your loss. I know this is an amazingly difficult time for you and you're probably wondering how or if you'll ever be able to smile again…but you will. It will take time for the shock to wear off and for the whole grieving process to work its way from A to Z but it will happen.
You mentioned that you wondered if people might think you were odd for writing at this time. But I don't because there's something quite theraputic about 'seeing' all the thoughts that are running around like mad in our heads.
So write all you want. We understand. And when you don't want to write or simply don't think you can ever write again…we'll understand that, too and we'll be patient for you because we know that deep down inside the bright flame that danced around all the joyful posts you offered the world will burn bright once more…in time.
We're all here for you…hundreds of us from all around the globe are here for you; to lend you our ears to hear you and our virtual shoulders to cry upon. Take all the time you need to grieve and please know that you are never alone.
Cordially,
L. Avery Brown
Write your heart out Lori, we are here, we are listening.
M2Mx
No magic words, I am sorry for your loss
Oh, Lori, I'm sitting here in stunned disbellief of what you've just told us-your precious life mate is gone!
So here is the love I leave:
Jesus, gather Lori and her 2 little ones close to Your tender heart. Rock them gently in Your almighty arms. Dry their tears and guide them through this valley of the shadow of death. Send folks across their path who will comfort them with comfort only You can give. And let them be caught up in Your peace that passes understanding. Amen.
i'm a friend of cate's and so very, very sorry for your loss. love2u.
I haven't read your blog(yet) and I've never met you but my hand is here for you to hold should you ever need it, for anything. Please, just ask.
No words can ever describe the pain but you will continue. I know you know you will.
In the meantime, here's a hug if you would allow me; and the transfer of solid strength to continue. I'll be checking back on you…..trust that God will make everything ok. He had a reason for needing Tony right now.
I'm sorry for your loss, Lori — my thoughts are with you and your family.
xoxo
I am so sorry for your devastating loss. I can't imagine what you're going through. My thoughts are with you and your beautiful children. *lots of hugs* x
I'd write too. It's source of power in an otherwise powerless situation. My thoughts are with you.
Raven
I am so sorry for your loss, Lori. I am praying so fervently for you and your family. You are a strong woman and a great mother. My thoughts and prayers are with you during this difficult time.
My heart goes out to you and your family. You are in my thoughts. xxxxx
Lori… *love* *hugs* *prayers for peace*
I have no idea what to say Lori, I'm so sorry for the loss you've had, all you've had to endure over the past few days and the tough road ahead of you. You're strength and resilience is obvious but know that it's OK for strong people to fall to pieces too. You have a tightly woven net of people pulled tight to catch you as you fall and many arms to help you up when you're ready.
Lori, I am so very sorry for your terrible loss, I just found your blog last week, you and Tony made beautiful babies, hold on to them tightly, he lives on through them. Sending you kind thoughts from Ireland, Julie x
Lori, I'm am so, so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
I'm weeping so hard for you that the bed is shaking.
It's not fair.
I'm here ….. look at all the people here, now, for you. Please keep writing through it, it's possibly what will help you most of all right now.
Oh love. Hold on. One breath at a time. Hug your babies.
Sometimes, there is just no sense to be made. So many of us are holding you up in our hearts and our thoughts.
XOXOXOX
Lori – I am so, so sorry. Sending you love across the oceans.
Lori, I am feeling for you, Can't imagine the size of the hole in the middle of your chest, but try and fill it with your beautiful children, they are your link to Tony and they will be there to guide you when you just don't think you can go on, and they will smile when you feel like crap and just a bit of that smile will be Tony smiling up at you. As you said, put one foot in front of the other and and hold on to all these arms for support. xxx Megs
You will do it. You don't have to know how, just that you will.
Love to you and your family.
Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul.
And sings the tune
Without the words,
and never stops at all.
–Emily Dickinson
Lori, I learned of your crisis from a Twitter acquaintance. I have followed your blog across the ocean, from here in NY, hoping for a miracle. I am so very sorry for your loss. My sympathies and condolences to you and your children and the rest of your family. Thinking of you often.
Laura
This is your space and just let it all out. We are thinking of you. Sending hugs to you and your kids.
I am so So very sorry. I can't imagine this loss.
Sending love and hugs.
Lori, let me know if there is anything I can do for you. Happy to help in any way I can. My prayers and sympathy are with you. Colin
I'm so sorry for your loss, Lori. And for Bump & Chop's loss.
Your strength through this is inspiring.
You have thousands of arms here, waiting to catch you. We'll be ready.
Lori, I just checked into the blogging world tonight and read your sad sad news. I am so sorry. I am glad you have found some solace in writing about your experiences and feelings. You have so many comment already from your online friends – I hope all this love will help you ride this wave and that you will continually ask for such support in the future. Sending hugs to you and your babies……xx
Lori, I hardly know what to say. I'm so broken up for you. But I'll try.
I'm so terribly sorry for everything you have endured. I hold you in love and peace and comfort, constantly.
Strength is a beautiful quality, and you have it in droves. It will see you through this. I think it's important, when you have the opportunity, to allow yourself to let go, as you have said, and let those around you be strong. You need to let go for a while and just heal.
We are here, your safety net. If you fall, we will catch you. If you break, together we will put the pieces back together. We will remain by your side through all of this.
Love you so much Lori. I wish I were there with you. Someday, I will be. xoxoxo
I'm so, so sorry.
More love from a new friend in the blogosphere. It is obvious you really are loved.I hope it can help you through your living hell. I am so sorry
Oh my goodness Lori, I am so so so sorry to hear your devastating news. How I wish there was more we could do for you
Sending you lots and lots of love, found my way here via The Miss Ruby, and just wanted to tell you how unimaginably sorry I am for your loss!
Lori, I don't know what to say. I am so sorry for your loss. I wish you solace in knowing that you and your family have been in our thoughts and prayers. It just doesn't seem enough.
Much love, Kevin
Lori – You have been in my thoughts and prayers every minute of every day. I am so sorry that Tony could not stay. I will continue to uphold you and your babies in my thoughts and prayers.
Know how loved you are here and also in the BB community. We have all been thinking of you.
More than Love Lori, More than words.
It's like soul reaching out to soul, to hold you up with the energy created by the most enormous outpouring of love, compassion and empathy.
Can you feel it?
xxLisa
It seems so natural to find you here, writing, sharing, being honest. It seems so natural to know that you find release here, writing, sharing being honest. I know you will find the inner strength to take one step at a time. Wish it didn't have to be this way for you, or for bump or for chop … but life is not always what we expect. I am so sorry you have lost your soulmate, your friend, your love. Hugs from Perth xxx
I cannot imagine what you are going through and just hope that your family finds peace and eventually happiness at the time you did have together. Just when you don't think you can go on, you will.
Oh Lori, I'm so sorry. I know he's at peace, but that doesn't make it any easier. Just take things one step at a time and please don't forget to take care of yourself through all of this.
Love and hugs!
we are here. we care. we are so so sorry and have no words. love. much love you are braver than I ever could be.
Lori, I am so very very sorry that you are facing this, that your husband has gone.. may he be resting in peace….
Thinking of you, your children and all family and friends at this tragic time.
I am sorry beyond words. Love and peace to you and yours.
I'm so very sorry for your loss Lori – words are completely inadequate.
lovelovelove
x
Lori, sometimes when I leave rambling comments on your blog at 2am it's because I need a good laugh. And your blog has been there for me. It has brought a little sunshine into a dark corner. I want to give that sunshine back now – you need it more than me. So I'm lighting a candle for you…don't let the stormy darkness hold you down…
xxxCate
You can find the strength within, Lori.
I am sorry, beyond that I really have no other words because what you're going through, what you're feeling – well I can't even begin to imagine.
Know that you're in my thoughts, in all our thoughts, know that you're not alone, know that when you need to lean, we'll all be here to support you, unconditionally…know that you are loved by so many, even people you've never even heard of…
~x~
Ah Lori, this is a truly sad day. I'm so sorry that you've lost your Tony. I'm sending you as much strength as I can to help you get through the days to come.
My heart is so heavy hearing of your pain and distraught. Take care Lori and just keep putting one foot in front of the other. x.
Lori, my heart is aching for you. This community is here for you, whatever we can do, we will!
This blog has been where you have shared everything so it makes sense to want to write here now. Some you will hit publish, some you will keep for yourself and your precious children.
I have been and will continue to pray for you and your little ones, for comfort, for solace and for support.
Lori
My tears flow with all the others at your great loss.
In those moments when you feel alone, know that we are all thinking of you, and are here for you.
Lori, my heart breaks for you. I also lost the father of my little girl, and I promise you, yes, it hurts like fuck, but one day it will hurt just a bit less, and you will smile again xxxxxxxxxx
Lori
I am so very very sorry to hear you devastating news …May you gather all the strength you have left inside and give yours babies the love and memories of their precious daddy..
Thinking of you all at this sad sad time
Teena
Yes you are strong, but until you can stand by yourself again, lean on us. Virtually, literally, whatever you need. My heart breaks for you and your kids tonight. I wish I knew you to drive to where you are are hug you. All I can offer is my virtual support – whenever you need it. Know hundreds, maybe thousands of us around the world tonight hold you, Tony and the kids in our hearts. We are here for you.
Lori, to you and your family I am so sorry for your loss…sending you love and strength. You are all in my thoughts x
So sorry for your loss Lori. Hold your little people close. You still have him. In them. x
Lori – I don't know you but came across your blog. I am so, so sorry for your loss. I pray for you and your little ones.
Lori you are an amazing beautiful strong and wonderful person. Please know that you are surrounded by love and we are here to support you and to pick you up when you need it.
Love and hugs to you and your family, now and always.
You are right where you belong – because you're right – this is your community. Some know you well, some have just met you. ALL will stand by you as you navigate the road ahead. Hugs and love for you and your little ones.
~Amy
Thinking of you and your family Lori. xo
Love, Love, Love….from a stranger xx
Tears are streaming down my face, my heart is breaking for you. I am so sorry for your loss. xxxx
he is with you and your little ones forever, hold them close, they will help you through. xxx
Love, strength and light for you and your tiny ones, Lori. xxxxxx
I would be right here too if I were in the same situation…sad but glad you can now move on intstead of being in limbo with the fear of the unknown. Hold your babies tight.
As one of possibly many who had never read your blog before hearing about the gate sof hell opening for you (via kim @ allconsuming)…
I am very sorry to hear that this has happened to you & your family, so suddenly and unexpectedly.
We are thinking of you and our hearts go out to you, and will be sending you strength over the coming days and weeks.
I have a list of books about death & grief for your littles, if that would help I can email it… otherwise send a friend to your local library or go to http://www.capersbookstore.com.au/category.asp?cid=33&t;=On+grief+and+loss+
Lori,
I haven't been able to stop thinking about you and like so many other mummy bloggers wish we could make all of this go away and bring Tony back to you.
you are so brave and strong already. You are already talking about putting one foot in front of the other.
take strength from all of the love that is around you, you are not doing this alone, we're all here for you and wishing we could take your pain away. Please sleep tonight and stay strong for your little ones. I won't stop praying for you Lori, none of us will.
Corrie
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sending you so much love. I just wish I could give it to you in person, and in meals and babysitting.
http://kympiez.blogspot.com/2011/01/destination-unknown.html
Oh Lori. Words fail me. I feel such sadness for you, and at the same time completely useless to be able to ease even a smidgeon of the pain you are feeling. You are stronger than you know, though. And the pain of loss is the worst pain imaginable. Be kind to you and allow yourself whatever you need to do to get thru this. You know you are loved by so many in this little community and hopefully whatever support we can offer will be of some comfort. You are never alone…
Al xx
Oh (((Lori))) my love I am so sorry that you have lost Tony.
I will continue to pray for you and your family. You are a wonderful woman and you do exactly what feels right for you now.
With love, Mich x
No words, just hugs
xxx
I am so sorry. I don't have any words.
Love and light for you and your babies. x
Sorry for your loss. Said a prayer for your Tony, for you and your family.
My lovely friend, you have a million arms encircling you, mine are there, intertwined with the others to protect you….
I wish I could do something for you….we will always be here for you xxxxxxxx
*Hugs* for you and your family Lori. B. xox
My heart breaks for you, so sorry to hear of your sad news ♥
My heart goes out to you. You are a strong woman and know that we are here for you. One step at a time….. xx
So very saddened by your loss:( You are amazing. Your kids are amazing. Sending you love xx
I am so sorry to read your news. I wished upon every star that the outcome would be so very different for you and your family.
One second at a time, one breath at a time, one foot in front of the other. That is all you need to do right now.
I understand your need to write, in my darkest hours writing and the online community buoyed me. Lots of love xoxox
I've been following your story for the past few days….. I've had to ride those same waves of grief for a husband and father gone too soon.
The writing helps.
The writing helps so many of us widowed before out time.
and sometimes, when it gets so hard to even breathe, please know that I am sending you big hugs and a wad of tissues.
XA
Truly sorry for your loss.
LOVE, Lori! You have it in you, it surrounds you and it will always be there. xox it's your light ok xox
You are strong & beautiful and brave. Crying a river for you. xxx
We're here. Whatever you need. We won't forget.
There is a big bloggy blanket of love and compassion wrapped around you Lori. You and your family have been ever-present in my thoughts since your first post about Tony and foremost in my prayers.
x F
One foot in front of the other Lori. I'm here, if you need anything!!! money, baby sitting whatever, reach out to the twitter community, we are here and listening. We're here. We're here. As you come out of the fog and into the realisation, we are here.
Honey, I understand entirely the need to write. Some things just need out.
Love to you, and strength. I wish for you peaceful sleep and an easy waking tomorrow and enough strength to do what needs doing.
xxx
You are amazing Lori. You can do it and you will and we will be here to catch you, help you, walk with you xx
Keep going one step at a time, and when u need to rest we will carry you xxx Jb
****LOVE*****
ready to catch you beautiful
xoxoxoxoxo
Oh Lori…you amazing lady. xxxxx
Oh Lori. It makes perfect sense to me that you are here. And yes you are strong. And we are strong. We will stand behind you.
My love to you all.
Lori, You know I am here for you at all times if you need me. I will be in touch next week when I get back and you have had some time. I have not stopped thinking about you. Take some time to stop and rest and hug those special bundles of yours.
xox
Leaving you love Lori, you are strong but I am still leaving truckloads of love to you and your family.
We are here for you xx
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your children, Lori. I'm only new here but I know that I'll be back.I'm so drawn to your voice and your blog and your honesty and your guts for sharing such intimate parts of your life. I'm so glad that you can find release in writing and blogging. It's such a wonderful outlet and the support here is unbelieveable. The blogging community is such a wonderful and tight-knit community. That is soooo obvious from all of these lovely responses. I hope that you will gain strength and support from that and take one day at a time.Much love to you xx
My sweet, we are here and will continue to be here. I know you are surrounded by support and love and will take a step back for now, but I am here always.
I understand the writing, it is the best therapy you can have.
Take care, much love, and I'll be here to catch you anytime. xx
Stay strong. You will get through this! x
ps: sconeonamission
Rhianon xx
Oh Lori. My heart goes out to you and your children xx Words seem so hollow, but I'll try my best. If there's anything I can do from up here, let me know…
stay strong.
Rhianon xx
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`·.¸(¯`·.·´¯)¸ .·
×°× ` ·.¸.·´ ×°×
Lori, when things are getting tough, just close your eyes and you will see 100's of us standing beside you, ready to hold your hold, ready to catch you.
Stay strong precious one, lean on us when needed we are here, always. xxx
Love Keshia xx
Oh, Lori, I am so sorry. Hugs to you and your little ones. Know that Tony will be watching over you from above.
Lori, i'm sending you bucket loads of love and prayers for strength to get you through the next few days and the next steps in your life. The writing will definitely help…let it out, let those emotions out, it is a comfort.
I only just discovered your blog via a link on Life in a Pink Fibro's Jacaranda Blue post, I'm so glad I did, now i can add to the well wishes sent your way via bloggy land. Hang on in there. Big hugs from a fellow Black Dog owner. Alison xxoo
I feel so so sad for you Lori. Sending you love from Belgium. x
You and your family are in my thoughts x
Lori I don't have the right words, but I just want to say you have touched so many people around the world. You'll get through this because you have no choice, but you are strong and I'm sure that will help. I'm thinking of you and your children. Much love to you. xx
Vale Tony..a man loved and treasured by his lovely Lori and two beautiful babies.
His days with you are shortened..but yet Tony is with you, each step you take – one at a time. His children have you and his love.
Lori, this place..the blog..the writing spot..is your sanctuary as well as a door to open.
You do the choosing… at times you will write, and only to Tony. He will love those words, and understand the words of anger and grief too.
Then, when you need that bloggy blankie to surround you…here is where you hang out and we are here for you in so many ways.
The Blogging and Tweeting and Real Life community will want to help. Let them.
They dont need to wait and see.
They need to do.
And its happening already.
Love and kind thoughts to you, as you make your head lie on a pillow of comfort with someone there to help you…family and friends I am hoping.
Denyse. A ret Teacher, Mum of 32 yo & 39yo
Grandma to 7.Wife of 40 y to Bernard who has PD and more.
I live in Sydney and you can always DM me for any help..don't wish to intrude more at this stage. XXXX
I am so sorry that this has happened to you & your little ones, I cannot imagine what you must be going through. Sending all the strength I can. Hopefully when the fog lifts a little you can think of something practical we can do.
big hugs
Mrs BC
xx
Write away. Just keep writing until it makes you feel better. Xxxxx
I do not know you Lori…but you have touched quite a few people and I am sure that you are feeling the love that a lot of this blogging community…you are in my prayers…and somehow you will override this with your 2 beautiful kids..Your husband and father although not here in person will always be there to guide you in spirit…Thinking of you xxx
I'm sitting here with tears running down my face, Lori. I'm just so so sorry.
The measure of support you have from the blogging community is a measure of how much you've touched peoples' hearts and lives with your blog.
Know that we love you, that we continue to pray for you, that we have our arms out to catch you.
xxx