You, Me And The Rainbow

by Lori Dwyer on June 27, 2011 · 16 comments

A few weeks after Tony died, when I finally found myself returned and connected to my kids… the loneliness settled over the Purple House like a mantel, a shroud. In the oppressive, smothering heat of summer, darkness falling late at night… it felt like Hell on Earth.

I’d take my son to bed, upstairs, and he would always want his light on, in a way he never had before. He would cry and beg me not to leave him. I could feel the loneliness, a dark shadow in the room, that made him afraid to close his eyes, because remembering his daddy there, it hurt too much. (He tells me now, sometimes, that “Daddy layed down with him, on the floor at the old house, when Daddy was in heaven asleep.”)

I know he he felt, because I felt the same. And the most difficult thing, was not being able to take the pain away.

And then I was sent a very special present.

Kirrily from Sunny Side Up-
a blog I return to, again and again, because Kirrily grieves her daughter so gracefully, so beautifully- mailed me this beautiful book for my children- You, Me And The Rainbow by Petrea King. And if anyone out there has small children who suffer from anxiety, I’d highly recommend it.

We only read it once or twice, a story of a little girl whose mother wraps her in rainbows at bedtime, to keep the fear away.

And then, every night as the Chop made that heavy journey to his tiny bed, his grief far too big for a sweet blonde little boy in Wiggles pajamas, we would begin to wrap ourselves in rainbows.

Green like the grass, and yellow like the sunshine, red like the Big Red Car. and I’d watch my little man relax and smile, and close his eyes and pretend he was sleeping in a blanket of beautiful colours.

And I’d turn of his light, and leave his room. And, blessedly, he would sleep, without his tiny voice calling sadly down the stairs to Mum, a hundred times before he slumbered.

The best possible gift I could have been given. Thank you so much Kirrily.

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{ 16 comments… read them below or add one }

Vicky June 28, 2011 at 4:13 pm

Thank you so much Lori for posting this. I now have a tool to use with my little man, who for a whole lot of different reasons, but reasons still relating to a missing daddy, anxiety has been rippling through his little boddy.

I cry with relief at such a beautiful gift…. thank you.


Melissa June 28, 2011 at 2:28 pm

What a beautiful book. I've loved Kirrily for nearly 7 years now, long before blogging and have never been able to forget Ellanor, or Kirrily's beautiful love for her.

I'm glad that the two of you are friends, and that she was able to help Chop.


Miss Cinders June 27, 2011 at 11:03 pm



Melissa June 27, 2011 at 9:11 pm

Wow – what an amazing gift. I'm so glad it helped your little Chop.


Dorothy June 27, 2011 at 8:19 pm

Sounds like a lovely book. Will have to hunt it down. Thanks Lori and Kirrily for sharing it…


A Daft Scots Lass June 27, 2011 at 6:58 pm

Sounds like a brilliant book.


Hope’s Mama June 27, 2011 at 6:28 pm

She's so lovely. I'm pretty new to her blog, like yours, but am so comforted by her words. I'm off to find this book as well.


Mum on the Run June 27, 2011 at 2:52 pm

That book rocks.
As a super special and appropriate gift – at a time when so many others didn't have a clue how to be there for you.
And as a wonderful treasure of a tale.
Thank you for sharing it.


Donna June 27, 2011 at 1:35 pm

What a simply gorgeous & heartfelt gift that I can imagine has helped beyond belief. xx


Kellie June 27, 2011 at 1:25 pm

What a gorgeous gift.
That book will help so many people, thank you Lori for sharing it x


Anthony from CharismaticKid June 27, 2011 at 11:47 am

When I was a kid my dad told me that god was always with me at night, and that helped immensely when I was scared. Now I know how to translate that in a more general way to people.


Crystal Cheverie June 27, 2011 at 9:21 pm

That's awesome! I'm glad something came along to help you help Chop sleep through the night.


Miss Pink June 27, 2011 at 11:05 am

Thank you for this.
I have been having some concerns lately with the kids. Anxiety is a very possible problem we may be facing and it scares me and makes me feel like I have failed as a mother.
I am definitely going to go and hunt this book down and hope it works.


Emily June 27, 2011 at 5:31 pm

What a lovely gift! x


Good Golly Miss Holly! June 27, 2011 at 1:00 pm

I'm going to order a copy now too. Anxiety is a big concern in our household. Thank you for sharing Lori x


Ames June 27, 2011 at 12:34 pm

I'm off to find that book now.


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