Search: label/chop My Son Has Been Kidnapped and Replaced With Some Kind of Alien. by Lori Dwyer on May 2, 2013 · 7 comments My son has been kidnapped and replaced with some kind of highly energised, relentlessly obnoxious alien being. Which may sound overly dramatic, but on some days- like today- certainly feels true. […]

Tweet Sticky Stuff, A Missing Cat and Thank Goodness This Week’s Over. by Lori Dwyer on July 27, 2012 · 12 comments It has been a strange kind of week… wading in salt water, almost buoyant enough to float, but not quite. Hating myself just a bit. Uncelebrating my third wedding anniversary. And- just for […]

Tweet Big School by Lori Dwyer on October 16, 2012 · 6 comments My Chop starts ‘big school’ next year. He’s so excited and so ready some days I could drop him off at the front office of the local public school and tell them he is their problem already, thankyouverymuch. Something tells me that, […]

Search: label/StationHouse The Sticks. by Lori Dwyer on April 29, 2013 · 8 comments I find myself occasionally feeling as though I have to defend my decision to live contentedly here in TinyTrainTown– in the sticks. Semi–rural. Bush. ‘All the way out here’. Each and every courier, tradesman or journo who’s ever come to the […]

Crazy Cat Lady Chronicles The Bus On Putty Road by Lori Dwyer on April 5, 2013 · 3 comments You might remember that just before Christmas, my mate Auntie Mickey and I went urban exploring on the Putty Road. One of the more amazing things we discovered was The Bus, and the many rumours that […]

Tweet Learning To Say ‘No’ by Lori Dwyer on November 2, 2012 · 6 comments I am– so very, very gradually– learning to use the word ‘no’, and apply it where necessary. It’s not about saying ‘no’ to my kids– I’m quite well practiced at doing that. And they are equally well practiced at hearing […]

The Chop Bribing Small Children With Technology. And Readers With Prizes. by Lori Dwyer on January 29, 2013 · 0 comments Because you’ve all been very, very well behaved and a lot of you have completed your mission for last weekend; I think its time for a giveaway. Or two. And a vlog. Here- in […]

Search: label/trains The Coolest Toy I’ve Ever Seen. by Lori Dwyer on December 17, 2012 · 7 comments As we’ve discussed many times before, my kids have a thing for trains. Steam trains, in particular. I consider it some kind of karmic punishment. I hated Thomas as a kid, probably only because my younger brother […]

Tweet Happy Birthday, Little Fox- Part One by Lori Dwyer on August 2, 2012 · 3 comments “Are you going to stay in the forest?No, Dragonfly. I have to go away.” Last weekend, on a sunny Saturday afternoon, I dressed my children in their party clothes and drove into the suburbs. We’re going to a […]

Tweet My Son Has Been Kidnapped and Replaced With Some Kind of Alien. by Lori Dwyer on May 2, 2013 · 10 comments My son has been kidnapped and replaced with some kind of highly energised, relentlessly obnoxious alien being. Which may sound overly dramatic, but on some days- like today- certainly feels true. It […]

Tweet The Water, Part Two. by Lori Dwyer on March 1, 2012 · 7 comments Continued from yesterday… I got my answer to the question I posed here yesterday, a few weeks ago. The Chop, the Bump and I were at a mate’s place soaking up some Vitamin D on one of the by few […]

Tweet Gastronomical Subterfuge‏ by Lori Dwyer on March 8, 2013 · 5 comments My children are fussy, finicky eaters. The Chop especially. He takes after me. The Bump has inherited her father’s appetite (”Can’t talk, eating…”), but has still been sadly influenced by me. Both my kids will pick and pull at food. They often […]

Tweet Bribing Small Children With Technology. And Readers With Prizes. by Lori Dwyer on January 29, 2013 · 0 comments Because you’ve all been very, very well behaved and a lot of you have completed your mission for last weekend; I think its time for a giveaway. Or two. And a vlog. Here- in fact, […]

October 2012 Five Minutes To Myself by Lori Dwyer on October 30, 2012 · 4 comments This post, and my manicure, sponsored by Nuffnang. They say that taking time for yourself is essential. I know that, in theory. It’s just that in reality it doesn’t work so well. It feels selfish and self indulgent to […]

2012 F*ck Christmas. by Lori Dwyer on December 26, 2012 · 9 comments Sometimes, for all my self awareness and ability to look things in the face… avoidance is the only way to cope. I don’t even realize I’m avoiding Christmas until it’s right on top of me, suffocating me with it’s false pretense of […]

Tweet My Boy by Lori Dwyer on February 15, 2013 · 2 comments I wrote this post months ago, before I met the Most Amazing Man In The Universe.  Due to changing from Blogger to WordPress (which, by the way, is going quite swimmingly after some earlier teething problems), it got lost in my Drafts […]

January 2013 You’re Stupid And I Hate You. by Lori Dwyer on January 31, 2013 · 23 comments I write posts like this… then I hesitate. I toss and turn things over, tumbling like rough rocks in my mind until they’re smooth and their edges don’t draw blood. I tumble and test the weight of […]

Tweet Little Kids Wearing Make Up…. by Lori Dwyer on April 4, 2012 · 40 comments *Dum dum dum* (Insert dramatic look here.) Make up for little kids. It sounds so suspect doesn’t it? Every mum I’ve mentioned this product to has, at first, stared at me, eyes wide in shock. I think they’re picturing […]

Tweet The Worst Cook In The World by Lori Dwyer on July 19, 2012 · 33 comments I am a terrible cook. That’s been documented here before, many times. I can tell you without fear of retribution that I’ve inherited this from my mother, who is also pretty hopeless. Although she scores bonus points for […]

Tweet Engelbert Does The #PBEvent by Lori Dwyer on October 11, 2012 · 7 comments My son has the most eclectic, awesome taste in music for an almost-four-year old. It is h his dad‘s fault, of course- there is only so much bogan Aussie pub rock a two year old can listen to before it […]

yup this one’s sponsored A Mother’s Day GiveAway (To make up for all those other presents you’ll get). by Lori Dwyer on April 19, 2013 · 16 comments This Mother’s Day giveaway happily brought to you by David Jones online store. Mother’s Day in Australia is the second Sunday in May. It’s somewhat of a […]

Tweet You’re Stupid And I Hate You. by Lori Dwyer on January 31, 2013 · 23 comments I write posts like this… then I hesitate. I toss and turn things over, tumbling like rough rocks in my mind until they’re smooth and their edges don’t draw blood. I tumble and test the weight of the […]

July 2012 Sin Eaters by Lori Dwyer on July 31, 2012 · 5 comments Folklore tells us that ‘sin eaters’ are sourced from the lowest castes of society past– beggars, thieves, bastards, peasants, and probably single mothers and whores as well. The task of the sin eater was simple– to relinquish the dead of their […]

Tweet The Circus by Lori Dwyer on February 22, 2013 · 5 comments I take my children to the circus this weekend, for what I thought was the first time ever. Until I remember that Tony and I took the Chop once a long long time ago, before the Bump was born. I can only […]

Tweet Full Meal Regression by Lori Dwyer on September 4, 2012 · 9 comments Full meal regression. (adverb; ‘full me–al re–gres–sion’; eg “That spaghetti bolognaise she attempted clearly shows she’s in a state of  full meal regression”)Definition: The state of one’s cooking and meal delivery skills when in rapid decline. *** It’s hardly a well […]